


There's a First Time for Everything

by sheepyshavings



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Domestic Fluff, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-18
Updated: 2014-04-18
Packaged: 2018-01-19 20:05:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 23,755
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1482244
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sheepyshavings/pseuds/sheepyshavings
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The saying goes 'there's a first time for everything': A series of vignettes depicting Emma and Regina and all of their firsts. (Diverges from canon after the end of season 3A)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Then

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Before the lost year

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Domestic fluff" is mentioned at the top, but since this part of the story follows the canon storyline up through season 3A, expect more fluff in the second part. :)

**1**

 

The first time Regina meets Emma Swan, she doesn’t really register the other woman's presence until Henry’s visceral declaration of finding his “real mom.” It is only then that Regina looks up and sees a mess of blonde curls and the small tilt of a head and a “Hi.” She blinks rapidly and feels her heart speed up in her chest. Henry’s birth mother? 

 

“How would you like a glass of the best apple cider you’ve ever tasted?” 

 

“Got anything stronger?” 

 

She looks Emma Swan up and down like some sort of criminal, following her movements with a hawk’s eye. She notices how the other woman slumps when she walks and swings her shoulders like a high school football player.

 

After assuring her that there is no father in the picture, Regina’s heart begins to slow back down to a steady _thump thump_ in her chest. Good news for all involved. Most importantly, good news for the fate of the potential father.

 

Emma sits awkwardly across from her on the couch Regina knows is the least comfortable one in the room. She can see the way the other woman fidgets in her seat and keeps avoiding eye contact, sipping her drink with an unsteady hand. Emma places the glass on the table, sans coaster, and Regina’s fingers twitch in an instinct to remove the offending object.

 

“I’m sure he’s just saying that because of the fairytale thing.”

 

Regina freezes entirely, her body going stiff on the couch. The drink she was about to take is left untaken. A sliver of a memory flashes through her mind, of the name Emma Swan on a printed fax and the pieces falling together-

 

The memory cuts off, just short of something, something that sits just on the edge of her consciousness. She gets the discomforting feeling that this woman, this vagrant whom her son dragged into quiet, peaceful Storybrooke, is someone to watch out for.

 

“I’m sorry, I really have no idea what you’re talking about.”

 

Emma’s eyes open wide for a second, like she understands the absurdity of the fairytale premise. And of course to anyone else, anyone not from back there, it _is_ absurd. Emma backtracks and laughs about how it’s all a ridiculous idea and how Henry’s shrink is Jiminy Cricket (how did _that_ get out of the bag?) and it’s just a story and imaginations run wild and how she really should get going.

 

Regina is more than happy to show Emma Swan out of her house. She opens the door to the study and lets Emma slip through.

 

“Thanks for the drink,” Emma starts, pulling the keys out of her pocket to a dreadful yellow car Regina had seen earlier. “Sorry again about your kid running away like that.”

 

She plasters on her best mayoral grin. “I’m sorry he dragged you out of your life. Thank you, for bringing him back,” she begrudgingly adds. “Have a safe trip back.” She’s itching for this woman to get out of her house and for Henry to forget her as soon as possible.

 

So much for a closed adoption.

 

Emma makes her way slowly down the front pathway, and Regina watches from the eyehole of the door until the other woman is almost at the street. Emma turns around and looks up at the wall of the house. Regina prickles at this; no doubt Henry is watching from his window.

 

Emma makes a face Regina can’t discern, perhaps regret? She then turns back and continues her walk to the yellow deathtrap. Curls bounce up and down with each step, and Regina finds herself glad that Henry did not inherit the ugly yellow hair or curls and she never has to be reminded of Emma Swan again.

 

That is, until she receives the call later from Sheriff Graham right after she’s just pulled the covers over herself.

 

“I’m sorry to wake you, Regina, but we have an incident.”

 

The first time Regina Mills meets Emma Swan, she wishes with all her heart that she could still send people spiraling into oblivion with just a simple thought. Unfortunately, Miss Swan is not going away.

 

“Yes, Sheriff, I believe we do.”

 

**2**

 

The first time Emma gets really pissed at Regina is after she wakes up in a jail cell with no recollection of what happened feeling like her head’s been run over by a steam truck.

 

And then Regina comes in to add insult to injury.

 

The night before, Emma had tried her very best to not come off as a former-delinquent teen mother (which she had been) and a lowlife with no future (which she is) or an irresponsible adult. On the adult front, she thinks she did something positive in bringing back a kid who appeared at her apartment door in Boston. It’s not like she really wants him, and Regina… well, Regina seemed pretty high on the “Parents you wish on the child you gave up for adoption.”

 

She had come off as professional, rich as hell (She’s the mayor, right? That’s about as high up as you can get in the middle of nowhere Maine.), pretty good looking, and she obviously cared more about Henry than Emma ever could have. It’s a dream come true, really, and it had made Emma rest easy when she’d driven away from the mansion.

 

Or tried to drive away, it seems.

 

She starts feeling a little irked at the other woman when Regina accuses her flat out of what, kidnapping Henry? Especially after that little _What is she doing here?_ quip, like Regina would rather see her dead than locked up in a jail cell.

 

It probably doesn’t help the former-delinquent teenage mother image.

 

Emma hopes she gains some brownie points back when she locates the credit card Henry had used to find her and she and Regina pay a visit to Mary Margaret.

 

However, she reaches pretty solid levels of pissed off-ness at Regina after the mayor gives the obvious cold shoulder to both she and Mary Margaret.

 

“She’s kind of a hard-ass,” is all she can come up with in response to the schoolteacher.

 

Later, after finding Henry at his castle and spouting a tearful confession about her shitty life to a ten-year-old, she returns him to his mother. Regina actually thanks her again, something that shocks her and she’s not sure why. Maybe she figures that Regina isn’t the kind of person to throw out frequent thank you’s.

 

That’s when the real bitter side of Regina comes out. Just as Emma is trying to explain that no, she doesn’t really want Henry back in her life but it’s funny because he arrived right as she made a wish to not be alone, Regina interrupts. She interrupts and proceeds to tear Emma apart right there on the front steps. At first Emma is taken aback and hurt, but the more Regina talks, the more her resolve hardens and soon she just wishes she could slap that condescending smirk right off of Regina’s face.

 

“Goodbye, Miss Swan.”

 

That fucking name.

 

“Do you love him?” Her voice wavers as she asks the retreating form.

 

“Excuse me?” Regina turns like she is considering calling the cops on Emma.

 

“Henry. Do you love him?” She bites her lip and works hard to maintain eye contact with the woman standing stiffly in the doorway.

 

“Of course I love him.”

 

There is no further conversation between them, and Regina shuts the door with a soft click, leaving Emma to stare at pristine white paint.

 

Her blood is pulsing in her veins, the adrenaline from the confrontation still on high. She’s not sure why Regina is so vindictive and quick to bite at Emma’s words. She’d had no intention of taking Henry back, but the way the other woman was so ready to snap at her about her wrongdoings makes her want to try. If for nothing else than to wipe that “Miss Swan” off her lips forever, so be it.

 

Emma’s always been impulsive and not very good at thinking things through before making decisions, but something feels right about choosing to stay in Storybrooke. What could the harm be in watching over Henry for a week, just to really make sure his mother isn’t some sort of evil queen? (From the limited interactions she’s had with Regina, she doesn’t entirely blame Henry for his accusation.)

 

She checks in at Granny’s after a run-in with a super creepy landlord who makes her spine crawl. With a view of the town square and a very homely room adorned with too many floral patterns, she drifts off.

 

-

 

Emma changes her mind the next day about the first time she gets really pissed off at Regina. Nothing compares to when she is framed for looking through Henry’s files and of course fucking Regina is behind it. And right after coming to greet her in the morning with a basket full of apples and a sickly sweet smile. Back in the jail cell, it’s poor Mary Margaret who bails her out. (Emma makes a note to send her a cake or something later.)

 

It is the moment she steps free of the sheriff’s station that she vows to get revenge. So, being herself and not thinking so much about impulsively doing things, Emma borrows a chainsaw from that drunken janitor Leroy and proceeds to destroy the damned apple tree in Regina’s yard.

 

Emma doesn’t know why Regina seems to hate her so much, but looking up with a shit-eating grin at the mayor’s furious expression in the window, she can at least give her a reason now.

 

“Because, sister, you have no idea what _I’m_ capable of.” She mentally gives herself a high five for throwing that line back in Regina’s face, and walks off feeling a little less pissed off and a little more in control.

 

“Your move.”

 

**3**

 

Getting punched for the first time hurts a lot less than Regina imagined it would. Maybe it’s because she already has enough energy rushing through her body from the blow she delivered to Emma moments before, but the sting of a fist to her mouth is just that: a sting.

 

She stumbles backward but catches herself to keep her body from actually tumbling onto the damp ground. Before she can fully recover, though, she feels a pair of hands roughly pull her by the lapels of her jacket. All she can discern is the unmistakable blonde hair flying past her face and suddenly she’s thrown against the wall of her family mausoleum. She gasps as the breath is knocked out of her and her head snaps back against the stone. That hurts a little bit more than the punch.

 

Emma is pulled away by Graham and Regina is free before more damage can be done. She brings a tentative hand to her lip and dabs gingerly at the blood pooling at the edge. Looking over at Emma, she sees the other woman still being restrained. Regina snatches her bouquet from the ground and prepares to leave. Emma departs first, brushing by her with an out-of-breath “Not worth it.”

 

Regina waits until Emma is out of the vicinity before turning to the Sheriff. “Graham?”

 

But he walks by her, too, barely glancing her way. She stands alone in the graveyard, clutching the white flowers in one hand and her other turning into a fist at her side. The two figures retreat into the mist in the distance and she turns to watch them go. She feels like a fool when her eyes prickle with the threat of tears. She wipes them away.

 

It feels like a long walk back to her car. Regina’s head is beginning to pound from the scuffle earlier and the cut on her lip persistently bleeds no matter how many times she licks the blood away. It’s times like these that she wishes for magic so she could just mutter nonsense words and have the skin seal back together.

 

It’s then that she stops in her tracks and a fresh flow of spite runs through her body. She doesn’t have magic, but she does have hearts.

 

On her journey into the vault, it’s not Graham’s face she pictures, but Emma’s. Emma Swan, deputy sheriff who waltzed into Storybrooke and won the town’s heart. Miss Swan who stole Henry and stole Graham and stole Regina’s perfectly constructed order. No, it isn’t Graham she cares about when she squeezes the heart in her palm. He is expendable, foolish, and not worth her time anymore. She’s not thinking clearly, and all she can see in her mind, blurred by fury and anguish, is Emma’s face when Graham stops breathing and goes limp in her arms.

 

Regina watches the dust fall from the crevices between her fingers. They’re shaking, and she clenches her hand and brings it to rest against her chest. She exits the vault, and finally places the lilies on her father’s tomb where they will rest until the next week.

 

As she drives home, her mind keeps wandering back to Emma Swan and her words in the graveyard.

 

_“Why is everyone running away from you?”_

 

Why, indeed. Regina has spent her whole life having people run away from her and she doesn’t even think why anymore. She repels people. Maybe she pushes them away.

 

When she arrives home, Henry is waiting with Archie by the front door. Once a week, as Henry is his last appointment, Archie drops him off to meet Regina as she comes home from work.

 

“I’m sorry I’m late,” she says. Henry’s face looks like he couldn’t care less if she were late, on time, or showed up at all. His expression makes her heart ache, but she smiles despite it.

 

“It’s fine, we actually just got here,” Archie says, patting Henry on the back. He tips his head at Regina and offers a warm smile, which she ignores.

 

“Thank you for walking Henry home. Have a good evening, Dr. Hopper.” Her words signal finality, and she leads Henry up the pathway. She doesn’t miss how he resists her touch and almost pulls away before relenting.

 

_Why is everyone running away from you?_

 

Just as they reach the door, a buzzing comes from inside her pocket. She knows what the call will be even before she plucks the phone and presses the call button.

 

“Hello?” Henry’s eyes narrow as she answers, like he knows something bad has happened.

 

_“Madam Mayor? This is Doctor Whale, and I’m calling from the sheriff’s station.”_

 

Regina exhales sharply, and Henry’s mouth twitches like he’s going to ask her what’s happening, but knows better.

 

_“This is very upsetting news, but we—Emma Swan was here and Sheriff Graham…well, he’s dead.”_

 

Trying to arrange her face into something akin to shock and sympathy, she takes another deep breath and places a hand on Henry’s shoulder.

 

“Mom, what’s going on?”

 

She gently hushes her son and returns to the phone call. “I can’t believe it,” she starts, making sure her voice wavers, “what happened?”

 

Whale goes on about a heart attack and how Graham’s heart was unstable and under high stress conditions.

 

_“Emma Swan is here with him and we’ve had the body taken away to the coroner’s to confirm the cause of death. I don’t think you’re needed, I just thought you should know.”_

 

“Thank you, Doctor. I’m-“ she pauses. Looking down at Henry, she knows she’ll have to tell him. “I don’t know what to say, but his passing will be hard on all of us.” She drops the phone from her ear and disconnects.

 

“Did something bad happen? Mom, tell me what’s happening!” Henry’s voice reaches frantic very quickly and Regina kneels down to face him.

 

“Henry, I don’t know how to tell you this, but Sheriff Graham passed away this evening from a heart attack.”

 

She watches his face screw up and his eyebrows knit together so closely it makes him look far older than his years. His lip begins to tremble and he blinks rapidly in an attempt to fend away tears.

 

“What did you do to him?”

 

She actually backs away at the accusation, his words hitting her like acid.

 

“Henry, what are you talking about-“

 

“I know you did something! Graham was good, so you got rid of him.”

 

Before she can say another word, Henry throws the front door open and hurries inside, not even bothering to take his shoes off as he runs up the stairs.

 

She stands up and keeps her gaze focused on the spot where he had stood moments before.

 

_Why is everyone running away from you?_

 

Regina digs her fingernails into her palms enough to draw blood and lets out a shaky breath. She crosses into her house and lets the door fall shut behind her.

**4**

 

The first time Emma actually works with Regina instead of punching her or cutting down her apple tree, it’s because Henry is dying or dead and the curse is real and Emma has already thrown Regina against some filing cabinets in the hospital storage room.

 

“It’s true, isn’t it?” She knows her voice sounds like she swallowed sandpaper, and it takes everything she has not to throw up.

 

“What are you talking about?”

 

“It’s true, _isn’t it_?” Emma screams, not caring if she pushes the other woman back too harshly.

 

Regina’s head falls back. She doesn’t look much better than Emma, her hair disheveled and her face blotchy from crying.

 

“Yes,” she croaks. It’s the most worn out Emma has seen Regina, and it’s disconcerting. The mayor has always been so high and mighty, power suits and bravado above anything Emma has ever seen. The unmovable force in the town has finally succumbed and she needs Regina to come back to her senses so they can save Henry.

 

“I was leaving town, why couldn’t you just leave things alone?” She sinks back a little, the shock of everything falling down on her shoulders.

 

“Because as long as you’re alive, Henry will never be mine!”

 

Emma almost laughs. After all this time, it’s always just been about Henry and how Regina just can’t hold on to him. And now he’s poisoned or cursed or whatever happens when you eat a magical apple turnover.

 

“We need help,” is all she can say, after hearing that magic is different here. Magic, like it’s an every day occurrence and they have to go see Rumple-fucking-stiltskin to fix it.

 

Of course, he’s cryptic and unhelpful as usual, but Emma gets a sword and has to follow Regina to some creepy abandoned library. The lift is a two-man job of course, so Emma gets to go down a face whatever or whoever Regina’s “friend” is alone.

 

“The only reason you’re not dead is because I need your help to save Henry. If he dies, so do you.” Emma is serious in her conviction because the only piece of her mind functioning is the part that says _save Henry_ and she doesn’t know what she’ll do if he’s gone.

 

“Then let’s get on with it,” Regina hisses, as level as ever.

 

On the ride down, Emma stares at the sword in her hands, realizing she has no idea how to use it. She also realizes that Regina isn’t going to mess this up because although she has been vindictive, spiteful, and intent on poisoning Emma, that woman cares about Henry more than anything else in the world. Given the chance, Emma bets Regina would give her own life to save his. Hell, she was willing to poison Emma to keep her son. It’s the reassurance she needs to keep going when the elevator comes to a rickety halt and the doors wrench open.

 

Of course when it’s all over and they’re both double-crossed by Gold (Rumplestiltskin? That lying, sneaky bastard. What Emma wouldn’t do to drive the sword through his boney chest.), it’s Regina that cries the most. Emma tries to keep herself from crying, but it’s no use and she watches from the doorway.

 

“I love you, Henry.”

 

When she bends down to kiss her son’s forehead, a warmth fills her chest, like the clouds parted and sun is beaming down on the hospital room. With a gasp, Henry’s eyes open and the monitor connected to him begins beeping again.

 

Emma nearly chokes from the surprised breath she takes in. Henry is alive.

 

“I love you, too.”

 

It’s only when she hears mumbles of voices around her that she looks around to see confused faces, Regina’s included.

 

“You did it.” The other woman is looking at her with reverence, eyes still shining from the earlier tears.

 

“I think you broke the curse,” Henry says, looking just as surprised as everyone else in the room. Emma just stares around her. Everyone is looking at her like it’s the first time they’ve met.

 

She watches as Regina hovers over Henry’s bed, her lips trembling and gaze holding steady to his.

 

“No matter what anyone says, I do love you.”

 

Before anyone in the room can stop her, Regina runs out. Emma is unable to do anything but keep her stare fixed on Henry, who is alive and okay and breathing. Only a tiny part of her brain wonders what will happen to Regina now that queen has been remembered again.

 

**5**

 

The first time Regina is saved by Emma is when she realizes she is out of magic and facing a very angry mob. She really had been relying in turning them all into mice or at least knocking a few people backward. All that goes out the window when she flicks her wrists forward and all that happens is a collective intake of breath from the people in front of her.

 

It’s terribly disappointing. She thought the flip of her blazer and her clever line about seeing the queen was an appropriate way to start off the curse breaking. Unfortunately, her magic seems to think otherwise.

 

Doctor Whale, being the disgusting human being he is, has her up against the pillar on her front stoop in not time. He threatens her and she rolls her eyes at him. Truthfully, she’s a tiny bit nervous of what’s going to happen, but she wasn’t really planning on being helpless against a mob.

 

“Let her go!”

 

Regina turns her head to look over Whale’s shoulder and there she is. Pushing through the crowd with determined shoves, the blonde hair is the first thing visible in the sea of people. Everyone’s savior, coming to Regina’s rescue, too.

 

And so comes the whole Charming family, spewing their righteousness into the crowd.

 

Emma pulls Whale away and looks at Regina for the shortest second with something- pity?

 

Of course, the pity party only lasts so long and Regina is soon locked up in the Storybrooke jail, devoid of magic and sick of dealing with anyone else in the town. Her only regret, that little something that won’t leave her alone no matter how much she tries to push it away, is that Henry is with them.

 

The moment the Charming clan leaves the room, she brings a hand to the lock and wills something to happen with all her might.

 

“Magic if different here,” the voice cuts through her concentration and she closes her eyes in annoyance.

 

“ _Dearie_.”

 

The second time Emma saves Regina is after her soul is almost sucked out by a wraith. Her whole body is still shaking when steady hands pull her off the floor. Her lungs are screaming for air and she can barely see in front of her.

 

Of course Charming thinks it’s best to leave her to die instead of fighting the wraith, and she can’t even blame him. You can’t kill something that’s already dead.

 

In the past, Regina has thought a lot about how she’ll die. She’s flirted with death plenty of times, been a breath away from demise on more occasions that she can remember. Maybe that’s why it doesn’t scare her anymore, why she’s resigned to the fate Gold set up for her.

 

Then Emma’s voice lifts through the silence, steady and unmoved by her father’s words.

 

“I made a promise to Henry. She’s not dying.”

 

Regina thinks she’s imagining it at first, maybe because Emma had just told her that she herself would die if Henry did, or maybe because she just isn’t used to anyone fending for her but herself. But, no, she looks up from the ground at Emma, whose face is the epitome of seriousness.

 

And just like that, they’re in her office and she’s pulling Jefferson’s hat out and feigning any knowledge of knowing that man. It’s really to just keep things moving quickly before the wraith comes back, but she really doesn’t want any more questions.

 

Emma sits next to her at the table, fidgeting uncomfortably. Regina can imagine her frustration about the situation. No only has Emma never experienced magic before, but in less than 24 hours she has already killed a dragon, broke a curse, and is now fighting a wraith.

 

“Did Henry really ask you to protect me?” She asks it offhandedly, still sure that if she holds hope out too long the promise will disappear.

 

Emma dips her head. “Yes.”

 

For the first time in a long while, Regina feels her lips tugging up into a smile. Even for this night, she has found a pocket of safety from the mobs and certain Charming family members who would rather see her dead at a wraith’s hand than anything else.

 

Of course, being herself and having fate mock her over and over again, the hat doesn’t work. As the wraith is screeching on the other side of the room, separated only by a thin wall of fire, she wonders if this actually will be the end.

 

That is, until she feels a hand rest on her arm. It is the most unexpected thing, feeling the strong buzz of magic fill her veins again after being gone so long. She actually sucks in a gasping breath at the sensation. Her hands twirl the hat and purple radiates out from it, signaling its success. She glances beside her and only catches a glimpse of Emma’s expression. The other woman’s brows are furrowed like she doesn’t really understand what just happened.

 

The third time Regina is saved by Emma is when the aptly-chosen savior pushes her out of the way as the wraith descends for the final attack.

 

She hears her name screamed before her world is knocked sideways and she finds herself sprawled on the other side of the floor. She turns back in time to see Emma disappear into the swirling void of magic right before the wraith follows.

 

Snow, being motherly and impulsive to a fault (like Emma), jumps in after her daughter.

 

The portal closes and the room is eerily silent. The only sound she can discern is the shallow breathing coming from her own body. As she stares where the hat sits motionless on the tiles, a strange feeling of loss comes over her.

 

Surely it isn’t because Emma is gone.

 

Right?

 

**6**

 

The first time Emma wishes Regina were still in her life is when Regina’s completely off-the-hinges mother tries to kill them in Fairytale Land. Multiple times.

 

Emma really has no idea what Regina can do in terms of magic. All she has going for her is she knows the other woman cast a curse that devastated an entire land and moved a population across realms. As far as her magical knowledge goes, that seems like a pretty big deal.

 

Which is why, while scuffling across the floor of her nursery trying to avoid being zapped by Cora’s magic, she thinks Regina might be helpful in this situation. None of her group knows jack shit about magic, and it sure would improve their chances if someone did. (It probably would have also helped when they were attacked by an ogre. Or, you know, just in general.)

 

Emma doesn’t think about Regina that much. Mostly she thinks about Henry and how he was so right about the curse and she was _so_ wrong. And really, the signs pointed to it the more she was in Storybrooke and she was just so dead set on not being anyone’s hero that she ignored it all.

 

She thinks about Regina when she meets Cora Mills. Cora Mills is a piece of work and Emma begins to connect little pieces in her head about why Regina might act the way she does. She’s been through enough homes with not-so-nice parents to know what it can do to a kid.

 

But, of course, she mostly thinks about Henry and getting back to him.

 

Emma can’t help but think about Regina, though, when they have to talk about Cora. The more they interact with Cora (and that super sleazy Captain Hook who may or may not be working for her), the more Emma wants to keep this woman from getting back to Storybrooke. It’s not just for Henry, it’s for the shivers that run down her spine when she thinks of having to face this woman as your mother.

 

And then there’s the fact that Snow White is her mother. It’s is still sinking in, even after seeing the beautiful room that would have been Emma’s had Snow White not shipped Emma in a tree to Maine. Or, if Regina hadn’t been spiteful and single-minded and cursed them all.

 

And here she goes thinking about Regina again. As Mulan and Snow (she’ll never get over the fact that _Snow White_ and _Prince Charming_ are her parents) start to make camp for the night, Emma can’t help but reflect on the night they were sucked into the portal. She’s still not sure what happened to spark whatever it was that got the hat working again. She has a vague recollection of reaching out to urge Regina to move faster and then suddenly there was purple smoke everywhere and the wraith was coming at them.

 

Pushing Regina out of the way had been an instinct, really. Her brain wasn’t really functioning at a high level when the threat of a soul-sucking magical being loomed. Instead, her train of thought had run something like: Soul sucker, no magic, suddenly magic, _wraith impeding!_ , person in front of wraith, push person out of way!

 

“Emma, are you alright?” Snow’s voice cuts through her thoughts and Emma blinks a few times to see her mother standing above her. The other woman is looking at her with a quizzical expression. “You looked like you were in pain.”

 

“No,” she says, laughing. “Just thinking too hard.”

 

Snow smiles warmly and crouches down next to Emma in the dirt, placing a hard on her head. Emma leans into the touch. Maybe it’s not so weird having a mother your own age.

 

“We’ll get back soon,” is all Snow offers.

  
“Yeah,” Emma murmurs. “I know.”

 

When the campfire is put out later and Hook is securely tied by one foot to a tree to prevent any funny business, they all settle in until the morning when the hunt for the compass begins.

 

As Emma shifts around trying to get comfortable on the bed of leaves and a meager blanket, her mind drifts to Henry. Is he safe? Is Storybrooke safe? She knows her dad, Charming, James, or whoever he is, will protect Henry. Does Regina have magic again? Would Regina put up with Charming/James to protect Henry?

 

Regina would protect Henry.

 

Emma tries not to, but her mind always keeps drifting back to that infuriating woman.

 

**7**

 

The first time Regina saves Emma, it’s not because she’s dead-set on saving Emma, not really. It’s because she has to prove to Henry that she really is willing to change.

 

She doesn’t know if she’ll live once she gets rid of the angry green magic swirling around the well, but Henry is behind her and with so much conviction in his voice. How easy it would be to get rid of her lifelong enemy and the only other woman vying for Henry’s love.

 

But she doesn’t really want that, does she? Mostly, she wants Henry’s trust, and in time, his affection.

 

Why does Emma’s face keep popping into her head?

 

Regina has justified thinking of the other woman frequently by saying to herself she’s just trying to figure out how Emma triggered her magic. It’s no coincidence that Jefferson’s hat began to work when the Savior had grabbed her arm. She felt the spark coming from Emma’s fingertips, the spark that sent a rush of magic through her veins.

 

She hadn’t been able to do magic after that without the help of her mother’s spell book. (She really needs to stop trusting Rumplestiltskin about anything. Ever. For the rest of eternity.) What could it have been about Emma’s touch that triggered it? Was it because she was the Savior, the product of True Love? It was the only explanation Regina could offer for the puzzling turn of events.

 

After she’s thrown backward by the force of absorbing the spell, Regina doesn’t have the energy to look up and see Emma drag herself from the well. Her body feels like she hasn’t slept in days and someone filled her veins with rocks instead of blood. But when she can hear Henry’s ecstatic cries of joy, she finally musters the energy to pull herself off the ground.

 

“Welcome back,” she says, trying her best to smile. Emma looks terrible, her hair matted at the ends and her clothes are covered in stains and frayed around the edges. Snow claws her way out of the well after her daughter, and Regina barely glances at her. Instead, she watches Henry burrow into Emma’s side as the woman puts her arms around him.

 

Emma smiles back at Regina and rests her head on Henry’s.

 

“Your mom’s a piece of work, you know?”

 

Regina wants to laugh at the first words Emma says after her rather adventurous journey to a land riddled with magic. After nearly getting fried to death on the return trip, all she can say is how Regina’s mother is a piece of work.

 

“That she is.”

 

-

 

Later, when everyone else has left to prepare for the big welcome back dinner, Regina sits alone in her home staring at her mother’s spell book. She didn’t protest when an invitation for her wasn’t voiced. She didn’t curse untold millions, or tell Henry he couldn’t go.

 

She’s trying her best and had waited until she arrived back at her doorstep before letting a few tears escape. She knows Henry is so happy to have his whole family together again, and Regina can withhold her bitterness for her son, at least this time. She’s feeling a particular bitterness about saving Snow and Emma and getting ignored in return, but the small rational part of her knows it will take more time.

 

That’s why she startles when the doorbell rings.

 

With brow furrowed and curious about who might want to try and behead the Evil Queen tonight, Regina walks to the front door and peaks through the eyehole. She narrows her eyes when she sees Emma standing uncomfortably on the porch, hands in her pockets and gaze looking everywhere except the front door.

 

Regina pulls the door open and catches herself grinning at Emma’s little jump of surprise.

 

“Can I help you?” she asks.

 

Emma’s hands shove deeper into her pockets. “Yeah about earlier-“

 

“You don’t have to apologize for your parents, dear.”

 

“No!” Emma cuts in. She looks taken aback at her own outburst and takes a step back. “No, what I’m trying to say is I think you should come tonight.”

 

Regina doesn’t respond for a moment, mulling over the surprising invitation.

 

“Excuse me?”

 

“I mean, only if you want to come. I just think it would be nice if you could, stay for a bit. Here’s the thing. You saved us, and you know, that means something.”

“I do know.” Regina pauses, watching Emma’s hopeful expression. “I suppose I could cook something quickly beforehand.”

 

“Really? That’s great!” Emma lets out an awkward laugh and begins to retreat down the walkway. “Dinner starts at 6:30, and you can always leave whenever you want.”

 

Regina finds herself raising her hand in a weak goodbye to Emma. She turns back inside and shuts the door, pausing to think over the last few minutes.

 

Is it a trap? No, Emma’s expression was too genuine, and the Charmings are all terrible liars, anyway. So what could have motivated the woman to come over and ask Regina personally?

She shakes her head, knowing she’s overthinking it. In any case, she can’t help but smile as she patters into the kitchen to whip up the fastest lasagna she’s ever made. It’s Henry’s favorite, of course, and she wouldn’t mind sharing a bit of her cooking prowess with the rest of Storybrooke.

 

Perhaps this is the opportunity to finally show the town that she’s trying. At the very least, she can do it for Henry.

 

-

 

Of course, after all is said and done, she finds herself alone in her house again with an empty lasagna dish and a heavy heart. The townspeople hadn’t tried to hang her, no. Maybe she had been too optimistic to think she could make amends in such a short period of time. Maybe Henry and Emma’s words weren’t enough to pacify the underlying mistrust everyone garners toward her.

 

Emma. Emma had followed her out of the diner.

 

_Archie made a cake._

 

Being angry and spiteful as always, Regina had snapped and she winces now thinking about her inability to just let things go.

 

_Wait, Emma- I’m sorry._

 

The look on the Savior’s face when she turned back around was part surprise part exasperation. Regina must have looked pretty sorry because the other woman’s expression softened.

 

_Thank you._

_You already said that._

_For inviting me._

Regina curls up in her bed, still devoid of Henry, still devoid of the town’s trust, and wishing the magic would stop humming in her veins. Her mind flits to Daniel, or what had once been Daniel. She still can’t help tears welling up in her eyes when she reimagines those final moments in the stable. Only Archie, Charming, and Henry know what really happened, Henry only in part. Her little boy won’t have to see everything ugly in the world quite yet.

 

It’s always before she falls asleep the she pictures Daniel’s face, can almost feel his presence next to her. It always disappears before she drifts off, but it’s been getting less and less clear every night. Part of her is terrified that she can’t remember the exact details of his smile anymore, but Archie keeps telling her that it’s okay to let go.

 

Regina is so scared of letting go when all her life she’s been so working so hard to hold on.

 

**8**

 

The first time Emma really argues in Regina’s defense is an odd experience for her. Both Charming and Snow look horrified at the idea of their daughter vying for the _Evil Queen_.

 

But it just doesn’t sit right with Emma. Looking over Snow’s shoulder into the room where Regina sits, it’s not the expression of a guilty woman looking back. It’s terror.

 

“She may have been the Evil Queen, but here, she’s just Regina.”

 

It was like questioning a scared animal when they had brought the former mayor in for an interrogation. When news of Archie’s death was pronounced, Regina’s eyes had widened and she didn’t speak for a few seconds. Emma had spent her entire career dealing with criminals. She has a knack for knowing when someone lies to her.

 

Regina isn’t lying.

 

It’s a stupid idea, really, to go to Gold for assistance. People in the town appear to consistently forget that Gold is a major player in all their fates, but he still seems to be the one everyone turns to. Her parents are all for it, so after sending a trembling Regina home until they can figure out what’s going on, they take a trip to the pawn shop.

 

Which is, of course, where Emma has to finally come face-to-face with the fact that she can do magic. Like, real magic. Shiny, shimmery, magical magic.

 

She’s pretty wary that Mr. Gold wants her to use Pongo as their witness, because she’s not really sure how a dog can be a reliable source, but takes the dream catcher anyway. (And why is it always a dream catcher? She left that phase after Neal had gotten her locked up, realizing it was stupid for her to have one and that dream catchers are way overused and cliché anyway.)

 

Emma’s heart sinks the moment she sees Regina enter Archie’s office, and she hears the audible gasp of Snow behind her when Archie collapses on the ground. She can feel her hands shaking, partially from the exertion of magic, partially from the shock of actually seeing Regina choke a man to death.

 

She puts down the dream catcher and turns to face her parents. Her heart is constricting painfully and she bites her lip. She thinks her parents are trying to talk to her, but her gaze is unfocused on the back wall of the pawnshop. She feels her chest tighten and her hands ball into fists at her side. Emma wants to throw something, break the glass display cases in front of her, anything to release the anger she’s feeling.

 

Emma had really thought Regina was trying. She had _saved_ them from being charred. She was so civil at Granny’s the night before, she looked so god damn innocent in the interrogation room. And Henry. She was trying to change for Henry, right?

 

Without waiting for her parents to catch up, she storms out of the shop, intent on facing Regina herself. She almost starts crying when her parents confront her. They have that “told you so” look on their faces and she wants to do anything but indulge them.

 

She feels stupid, naïve, but mostly she feels betrayed.

 

When she raps intently on Regina’s door after they’ve formulated a plan to capture her, Emma is already steeled to deliver the news.

 

When Regina opens the door, she looks happy to see Emma, and for a moment Emma’s resolve wavers. For just that one moment she wonders if Gold was wrong.

 

Regina fights the idea, of course. Regina has always fought against Emma, why would this time be any different? Emma only becomes more convinced of the woman’s guilt the more worked up she gets.

 

“You can use magic?”

 

Emma pauses for a moment, furrowing her brow at the expression on Regina’s face. The other woman looks stricken with worry, her mouth hanging slightly open.

 

“I can assume he warned you then.”

 

“About what?”

 

“That magic _always_ comes with a price.”

 

For a moment, it seems like Regina has forgotten about being accused of murdering Archie and all she cares about is the Savior’s magic.

 

Which is ridiculous of course.

 

Then Emma brings up Henry.

 

If she weren’t so intent on avenging Archie, she might almost feel bad at the dramatic change in Regina’s demeanor. Maybe it was a low blow, but she’s too angry too care about playing fair anymore.

 

Maybe she provoked Regina’s wrath and the magical shove to the pavement was well-deserved, but once she starts, Emma brings out everything she can think of to hurt the other woman as much as she can. She can’t imagine breaking the news to Henry afterward, and it only spurs on her rage when it hits her that he’ll be beyond heartbroken.

 

“We know how you are, and how you will always be.”

 

Expecting an attack, Emma braces herself, but only gets a puff of purple smoke to the face. She stares at the spot where Regina had stood moments before, her heart thumping in her chest and her cheeks flushed.

 

Before Emma picks up Henry from the bus stop, she goes home to change. The moment the door closes, she takes in a shuddering breath and can’t help the strangled sob that escapes her body. She puts a hand against the door to steady herself and stays there until she’s reduced to quiet whimpers. Wiping away the tears and snot with the back of her jacket, Emma stumbles up the stairs to her room.

 

She had been so sure about it, and that’s what hurts the most.

 

**9**

The first time Regina realizes she is utterly and completely infatuated with Emma is when they save Storybrooke together. Of course, it’s been a path she’s been heading down for a while now, but it hits her hard when Emma is walking away.

 

She had really thought she’d get over it after Emma so righteously accused her of murder and then ran off with her son while Regina fell once again to Mother Dearest. (Who is dead now because of Emma Swan’s mother. That is an entirely different conflict and Regina deserves a medal for not killing Snow White the moment she had stepped onto her porch.)

 

It’s been a long time coming and it kills Regina to admit it because Emma Swan is the daughter of two people she wishes had never existed. It kills her that, even after months of animosity and the unfortunate frame jobs and attempted poisonings, she feels her heart drawn inexplicably to the Savior. It swells when Emma is in her presence, and she still fights it every time.

 

Emma will never know, of course. Regina is used to being disappointed over and over again by the people she loves. This time would be no different, she suspects. Who could ever love Regina Mills, the Evil Queen and mastermind of ruining lives? Not the Savior. Emma is the lightest being and she the darkest. Emma is the daughter of true love, Regina merely the product of neglect and a mother with no heart.

 

It seems like fate is always having a good laugh where she’s concerned.

 

It’s not like she’ll be around to tell Emma even if she works up the courage. When the curse’s self-destruction had been initiated, she felt the dread of knowing what she’d have to do. Following suite, Regina had chosen to face down death yet again. Perhaps it’s poetic that the day she finally admits her feelings to herself is the day everything will disappear anyway.

 

The self-destruct is powerful. She designed it to be unstoppable, and her magic skills are still rusty from 28 years of dormancy. The pressure of the energy pushes on her bones. It takes all of her concentration to keep the magic contained, but it’s a battle she’s quickly losing. That is, until familiar blonde hair catches the edge of her vision.

 

Once again, the Savior comes to the rescue. With her parents and _oh!_ Henry is here; she feels a moment of elation before realizing this is the epicenter of the town’s destruction.

 

“What are you doing here?” she asks accusingly. Leave it to the Charmings to bring her son to the most dangerous place in the town.

 

Henry looks at her with what she can only consider reverence, a look she’s unaccustomed to seeing on his face. It takes her aback, and her magic skips a beat.

 

“You were willing to die to save us. That makes you a hero. And now we’re gonna be heroes.”

 

Her heart speeds up. A way to stop the it? Impossible.

 

“We have to try,” chimes Snow, ever the optimist.

 

Henry, Snow, and James huddle against the wall while Emma reaches for the magic bean that will create a portal. It’s a ludicrous plan, but Regina begins to hold out hope that maybe they all won’t die after all.

 

“It’s empty.” Emma turns around with a stricken look on her face.

 

Fate is always having a good laugh.

 

“I can’t contain this much longer.” She can’t. The pulse of magic coming from the diamond is overpowering her own energy. It’s an aching pull and the mounting pain is an indication that she has to let go soon. She was never meant to be the Savior, not for Emma, not for the town, and not for her son.

 

Regina watches as the small family gathers to say their goodbyes. She feels tears beginning to prickle at the edges of her eyes as the magic around them increases.

 

To her great surprise, Henry breaks away from the rest of his family to stand next to her. She lets out a laugh, broken by a sob that escapes as Henry looks up to her.

 

“I love you, Henry.” In the end, it’s enough that her son thinks she’s a hero. Perhaps while the rest of the town will never forgive her, she can finally find peace in Henry’s acceptance.

 

“I only wish I was strong enough to stop all this.” Henry leans in then, and something inside her breaks. The tears that escape burn as they trail down her cheeks. She closes her eyes and begins to withdraw her magic. Emma is having none of it. Regina lifts her head to see Emma gazing at her with a look of pure determination.

 

“You may not be strong enough, but maybe _we_ are.”

 

For a moment, Regina forgets that her own product of destruction is rapidly growing in between them and stares at Emma. Warmth pushes against the power of the magic eating away at her body.

 

Emma steps closer, tentatively lifting her hands out. She’s timid. Regina wants to tell her that magic will devour her if she’s timid, but the Savior flexes her fingers and the self-destruct surges. Regina sucks in a deep breath as part of the magic gets drawn from her reach and pulled into a blue stream reaching up to Emma’s hands. The weightlessness she feels once half the burden is gone is heavenly.

 

Emma face screws up in concentration, her body shaking with the exertion of energy. Regina regains her focus and tenses the muscles in her wrists. She still doesn’t know if she’s going to die in this mine tunnel, doing magic with the _Savior_ and trying to prevent a town from self-destructing. She doesn’t care because behind Emma is Henry and Regina feels a strange sense of calm knowing she might die with the only two people she really cares about next to her.

 

It seems like fate wants to be kind today, and with a shudder that the entire town feels vibrating along concrete and dirt, the self-destruct lets out a blinding light that sends both Regina and Emma flying backward. The wind is knocked from Regina as she hits the ground with a resonating _thump_. Her eyes are closed while her head realigns itself, but she can swear she’s alive. When she can see straight again, she pulls herself off the ground to see the diamond sitting harmless on a rock. The magical waves that had been emanating from it are gone.

 

“We did it,” Emma says, her words coming out raspy. Regina takes a moment to catch her breath.

 

“Indeed we did.”

 

It seems like it’s going to be an okay day after all, until they realize Henry is no longer in the mine with them. All thoughts of Emma and how they use magic together beautifully drain from Regina’s mind.

 

The next half hour is a blur in her memory, and all she knows is Henry is out there with those two monsters. As she helps hoist the sails on Hook’s ship, she glances over to see the murderous glare in her eyes reflected in Emma’s as well.

 

**10**

 

Traveling with Regina is unpleasant. Scratch that, traveling with her parents, Hook, Regina, and Rumple-fucking-stiltskin is unpleasant. It seems like everyone on this ship wants to kill someone else aboard and Emma really can’t stand any more drama in her lifetime, let alone the boat ride to Neverland.

 

The first time Emma sees her mother physically fight anyone is when she punches Regina in the face.

 

A storm follows and Emma almost drowns herself trying to stop it all.

 

She hopes they can find Henry, defeat Peter Pan or whoever the hell they’re trying to defeat and return safely back home where Emma is seriously considering moving away from so nothing magical will ever happen in her life again.

 

Except she’ll kind of miss her parents. And maybe Regina, a little bit. No one else can bicker with her quite like Regina can. While Emma doesn’t enjoy arguing all the time, it’s nice to have a sparring partner. And she’s pretty sure Regina isn’t going to try and kill her or poison her or banish her to another realm or anything. At least not anymore. They’re bound together now, on this mission to save their son. Again. Emma is going to have to have a long talk with Henry about his knack for getting into seriously dangerous situations.

 

She can’t even imagine him if they returned to Fairytale Land. Chances are high that he’d get the bright idea to slay an ogre and end up getting eaten.

 

Emma feels sick enough as it is from the turmoil of the ocean, and thinking of Henry being eaten isn’t doing wonders for her stomach.

 

When they finally manage to land upon the shore, she’s so grateful she doesn’t even want to think about Regina’s cold shoulder toward friendship. Regina can shove it for all she cares. She’s tired, her son is lost, and Hook keeps trying to hit on her and she really wishes he wouldn’t.

 

Rumplestiltskin leaves immediately and Emma swears on her life she’ll never trust him with anything again. She feels like they keep doing it and it’s really just foolishness on their part at this point.

 

When they turn in for the night, it’s in some weird clearing where everything is kind of blue. Actually, the whole island seems to always be kind of blue. And night. It always seems to be night.

 

Emma lays down on her coat, trying to get some sort of sleep for whatever adventure tomorrow will bring. She made sure to be far away from her parents (who knows what they do before bed), and Hook (who knows what he’ll try before bed). That leaves her just behind Regina, who’s magicked up some sort of sleeping bag. Emma focuses her energy on making a sleeping bag for herself, but nothing happens. So she can stop a town from self-destruction but she can’t make a sleeping bag. Great.

 

She’s just about to fall asleep, her eyes heavy with the exhaustion of inter-realm travel. It’s then that she hears a hitch of breath coming from next to her. Emma quiets her breathing and stop shifting around. Yes, there is a faint whimpering noise coming from Regina.

 

She lays still, unsure of what to do. Should she ignore Regina and fall asleep? Even if she did say anything, wouldn’t the other women just get pissed off that Emma bothered her?

 

“Regina,” she whispers, quietly enough that no one else will be able to hear.

 

The whimpering stops abruptly. Through the gloom of the air Emma’s vaguely sees a hand come up as Regina wipes away at her face.

 

“Yes, Miss Swan?”

 

“Oh, please. Don’t ‘Miss Swan’ me anymore.” Emma almost rolls her eyes at Regina’s predictability.

 

An indignant huff comes from the silhouette next to her. “Yes, _Emma_?”

 

What does she say next? She’s not a touchy feely person and she’s certain Regina doesn’t want anyone prying into her life.

 

“You good?” Smooth, Swan.

 

There is a silence that hangs in the air like a heavy fog between them. Emma is sure she should have just shut up and let Regina cry in peace. What was she even thinking, reaching out to her? It’s not like Regina’s ever done anything for her. Plus, it hadn’t even been Emma’s bus-

 

“I’m worried about Henry.”

 

She has to strain to hear the words. Regina’s voice is a wisp, barely crossing the distance to her ears.

 

“I know,” is all she can respond. Her heart settles heavily in her chest. She’s never been one to be optimistic, but the island gave her a sense of dread the minute they reached shore. It was hard for her to imagine Peter Pan as anyone but the youthful redhead from the Disney movie, but as she had learned in the last month, her imagination was in need of an adjustment.

 

In a move that surprises Emma, she reaches a hand out to rest it on Regina’s upper arm. The other woman flinches when she feels the contact, but doesn’t pull away.

 

“I’m terrified.”

 

Regina turns her head toward Emma at the confession.

 

Emma’s pretty sure neither of them can see the other’s face, but she tries to put on a reassuring smile. She doesn’t feel brave, or like a savior. Everything she’s gotten away with so far has been because of sheer luck or-

 

Or because of Regina.

 

“I’m terrified and I have no idea what’s going on. I can’t even make magic and I’m here in Neverland of all places trying to keep my son from getting hurt. But you know what? It’s going to be okay.”

 

She can’t see for shit, but she thinks Regina’s brows are knit together. Maybe she got through to her?

 

“You are an idiot, Miss Swan.”

 

Emma almost scoffs but then Regina continues.

 

“But you’re a dreadfully optimistic one. Thank you.”

 

It stuns Emma to hear those words from Regina’s mouth. She can count on one hand she’s heard a genuine word of gratitude from that woman. Before she can think to say anything else, the woman in question rolls her shoulder to shuck Emma’s hand off and she pulls the sleeping bag up to her ears.

 

Letting her head fall back to look at the grey sky above her, Emma keeps her eyes open until she can’t anymore. Her sleep is haunted by fragments of Henry’s voice. He keeps trying to tell her something, and then suddenly he’s gone.

 

Emma’s eyes snap open and she finds the sky has lightened. Looking around her, she finds the rest of the group is still asleep. She groans inwardly and covers her face with her hands. Her whole body feels like it’s made of concrete and her back is bent into oblivion.

 

“Rough night?”

 

This time Emma flinches. She looks over to see Regina with her eyes still closed but the hint of a smile on her lips.

 

“Yeah. It was Henry. He was-“

 

“I heard it, too.”

 

Emma stays silent, staring into the canopy of strange trees. The air is wet with early morning dew and it smells like seawater all around her. She reaches her hands above her head and her back cracks in fifty different places. She winces and flops her body back onto the ground.

 

“That bad?”

 

“Not everyone can conjure a sleeping bag out of thin air.”

 

“You could have asked.”

 

Emma snorts. “Yeah, like I would ask for you to magic me a sleeping bag. I’m sure you’d be delighted to help.”

 

“Fine, then.” Regina’s voice becomes sharper and she turns away. “Sleep on the dirt.”

 

“Hey,” Emma starts. “I didn’t mean to- I was just joking.” She sits up and instantly regrets it. Blood rushes to her head and it seems like her back isn’t the only part of her body that cracks fifty times.

 

“Would you magic me a sleeping bag?”

 

Regina harrumphs from her cozy nest.

 

“Please?” Emma tries. She hasn’t even tried to play nice and bargain with Regina before, but she would do just about anything for a warm, comfy sleeping bag right about now.

 

Suddenly she finds herself lifted slightly of the ground and-

 

 _Oh my God a sleeping bag has never felt so good_. Emma sinks into the soft mesh-like fabric and her entire body feels better instantly. She nearly groans at how good it feels. Wow, she was in a weird place.

 

“Hey, thanks.”

 

“Anything to keep you from whining,” Regina says from her resting spot.

 

Emma stretches her leg across the distance and nudges Regina’s side.

 

“Asshole.”

 

**11**

 

The first time Regina Emma and create a lunar eclipse-

 

Okay, that just sounds ridiculous.

 

But, really. A _lunar eclipse._ Together. Emma’s magic is remarkable and just a few days after finally figuring out how to make it work, she can move the moon with Regina.

 

They are so close to Henry and she knows it. Regina keeps the part of her consciousness at bay that keeps telling her it’s too late, that Pan has already gotten what he needs. She fights avidly to push down the sinking feel that comes along with this thought.

 

When she turns to Emma, it’s easier to do.

 

_It’s going to be okay._

 

The words ricochet in her mind when she fears for the worst. They’re simple words and yet they ground her when she feels the hopelessness crushing in. She doesn’t know why, but Regina somehow knows that everything is going to be okay. Because Emma said so.

 

Henry is coming home. She’ll make damn sure of it.

 

When they do finally get a hold of Henry, he’s without a heart and Regina curses the stars and moon and whatever other planetary bodies she can think of. She’s so tired of fighting for her son’s life.

 

 _Our_ _son._

 

Regina looks up at Emma as she keeps her hands rested on Henry’s chest, just to make sure his body still lives.

 

“So, yeah. I know how you feel.”

 

Regina’s blood boils. Emma does _not_ know how she feels. Emma has parents who love her to pieces, a pirate and a thief who pine after her, and the adoration of the townspeople. Emma has security, she’s the _Savior_ of everyone. Regina has no one but Henry. He is her everything.

 

Out of the corner of her eye, she sees Emma kneel down.

 

“You’re right,” Emma whispers. “I don’t know how you feel. So what do you want to do?”

 

Regina turns her head and ends up looking right into Emma’s eyes. They’re sorrowful and exhausted, the eyes of a mother whose son is dying.

 

“You want to run the show, run it.” Emma pauses, something flashing across her face that Regina can’t pinpoint.

 

“How do we save Henry?”

 

As usual when working with anyone in the Charming clan, their plan goes horribly wrong. Snow leads them right into a trap where Pan has surely been waiting for the right moment to strap them on onto a tree of all things.

 

As he goes down the line taunting them all with their past misdeeds and poor choices, Regina rests her head against the trunk of the tree and closes her eyes. She’s beginning to get a headache and Pan is so close. Henry’s heart is so close. If she holds her breath she can feel the _thump thump_ coming from the bastard’s chest. That heart does not belong to him.

 

“Are you finished?”

 

“Last words from the Queen. Perhaps a death bed confession from the one who has the most to regret of all?”

 

She smirks and begins to pull on the vines entrapping her wrists tightly against her body. She can feel them beginning to give and the magic whirs inside of her with no other prompting.

 

“Yeah, there’s one problem with that. I did cast a curse that devastated an entire population. I have tortured and murdered. I’ve done some terrible things. I should be overflowing with regret but-“

 

Her hands tingle with strained energy. She feels Emma shift uncomfortably next to her and wonders if perhaps she’s being too honest. Then, she gets a glance at Pan’s face and all doubts disappear, her mind focused solely on making him pay.

 

“I’m not.”

 

Regina gives one strong tug and the crisp snapping of the vines fills the quiet night air. Pan flinches and takes a step back. She feels a wave of the Evil Queen wash over her and grins in a way that she hopes is predatory before advancing.

 

“Because it got me my son.”

 

The warmth that spreads up to her forearm as she plunges into Pan’s chest makes her suck in a breath and close her eyes. She hears Snow and Emma gasp from beside her. With a sickening squelch, the heart, _Henry’s_ heart comes right out of Pan and into her palm.

 

He falls to the ground with a sickening thud and Regina resists the urge to kick him where he sits. Instead, she scoops up the box holding Rumplestiltskin and stands up straight.

 

“Now, let’s go save Henry.”

 

They find him laying on the deck of the ship, still and the color drained from his cheeks. Regina’s chest tightens and she blinks a few times to keep her eyes clear. Hurrying, she and Emma run over and crouch next to their son.

 

With all the tenderness she can muster, Regina places the glowing heart over Henry’s chest in the spot where it should have been resting had it not been so hatefully torn from him. With a gentle push it sinks down into his body.

 

“Henry?” Emma says from next to her. It’s tentative, still worried he’s been too long without a heart.

 

“Henry?” Regina tries, her voice rising in a panic she can feel steadily building inside of her. This is supposed to work. You put the heart back into the body and the person comes back. It’s supposed to work.

 

“Honey?”

 

A gasp and her son opens his eyes.

 

Regina almost chokes on the sob that claws up her throat. Henry takes a few deep breaths and sits up, only to be engulfed by his mothers’ embrace.

 

There is a quiet that passes over Regina’s mind then, a calm after the storm. The warmth of her son is pressed against her and she can keep him safe, keep him whole. She looks up for a moment and catches Emma’s eye.

 

The tension is gone from her face. When she notices Regina looking at her, her lips curl up into a slight smile.

 

Regina feels it then. Something sparks inside of her when Emma looks at her and Henry is still lodged between them. It feels like nothing else in the world can go wrong.

 

It’s like the hole in her heart is slowly patching itself over.

 

**12**

 

It hits Emma hard the first time she realizes she might not hate Regina as much as everyone thinks she does. It’s difficult to assess the situation, though, since there is a billowing cloud of magical smoke that is quickly descending on the group of people gathered at the town line.

 

She’s just been told she’ll lose her memories. Of this place, of her friends and her family and, and of… Regina.

 

She doesn’t know why she cares all of a sudden.

 

Maybe it’s because Regina is giving she and Henry a chance to live their lives free from curses and memories of almost dying on many separate occasions. A chance to start over, like Emma never gave Henry up and they’ll always have been together. A chance to be alive.

 

Their best chance.

 

_“It’s okay. I know why you gave me away.”_

 

Henry looks so much younger in her memory, sitting on top of his castle with the giant book of fairytales on his lap. She remembers looking at him and feeling something, something warm and conflicting growing in her chest.

_“You wanted to give me my best chance.”_

_She sucks in a breath and turns away from him, her mouth agape and tears springing in her eyes._

_“How do you know that?”_

_“The same reason Snow White gave you away.”_

_She laughs to herself, turning back to Henry. She is sick of the fairytales, sick of the persistent nag that maybe her parents might be out there trying to find her and that she has to save everyone._

_“Listen to me, kid. I am not in any book. I’m a real person, and I’m no savior.”_

_Henry’s face falls and a spark of sadness fills her at disappointing him so much._

_“You’re right about one thing, though.”_

_He looks at her with questioning eyes and suddenly she’s eighteen again and grabbing the edges of the hospital bed with hot trails of tears burning her cheeks and her body exhausted from the efforts of pushing out a baby. She glances for one second at the direction of the doctor and sees a red face covered in slime, hair plastered to wrinkled skin and tiny limbs flailing into the air. It’s one second too much and although she can’t keep him, she thinks she’ll never see something so beautiful again._

_“I wanted you to have your best chance. But it’s not with me.”_

 

Here they are, full circle. Regina is giving Henry his best chance, and it’s with Emma. She wants to laugh at the irony of the situation, but all that comes out is an unrefined choking noise.

 

Regina reaches out and take her hand, and something warm and reassuring fills Emma to the brim. The hand filling hers is so sure and comforting and maybe it doesn’t matter that all of her memories will be erased. In this moment she trusts Regina with her heart and soul.

 

“My gift to you is good memories. A good life for you-“ Regina turns and beckons for Henry to come over. He does, and it doesn’t stop the ache Emma feels when she realizes it’s the last time Regina will see Henry ever again.

 

“And for Henry.” Regina looks at Emma again and a pained smile paints her face.

 

“You’ll have never given him up. You’ll have always been together.” Regina’s voice cracks on the last word.

 

“You would do that?” Emma asks breathlessly.

 

“When I stop Pan’s curse and you cross that town line, you will have the life you always wanted.”

 

Emma wants to break down on the pavement and never leave Storybrooke. It’s all too much too soon. She isn’t ready to say goodbye. She’s not ready to be a full time mother, she’s not ready to live the life she’s always wanted.

 

“But it won’t be real.”

 

A quick flash of Regina’s smirk passes. “Well, your past won’t, but your future will.” She places a hand on Henry’s arm and holds it there.

 

“Now, go. There isn’t much time left and the curse will be here any minute.”

 

It takes every ounce of willpower Emma has to pull Henry away from Regina, pull herself away from everyone she’s known and cared about. She yanks the door to the yellow bug open. (She recalls Regina’s spiteful words of “yellow deathtrap” and they echo through her mind. She chokes on unexpected laughter that bubbles from her throat and quickly turns into crying.) Henry grabs onto her hand as they both sit down and doors shut with a shuddering creak.

 

She doesn’t look at the rearview mirror as the engine sputters to a start. She knows if she does she’ll see everyone’s expressions and her mother’s look of complete defeat, Regina’s face matching only too well.

 

Emma can’t help but feel like she’s stripping Regina of the last of her happiness.

 

The car moves forward slowly and a gust of wind passes over the two passengers when the orange line is crossed.

 

Emma blinks and looks at the open road before her. She feels something wet drip down her cheeks and lifts a hand to find tears spilling from her eyes. She wipes them away, blaming the sunlight that’s reflecting on the blanket of clouds above them. Henry smiles at her from the passenger seat before putting a CD in for the rest of the drive to New York.

 

Later, Emma will find herself strangely attracted to women with short brown hair and eyes that speak of loss. Sometimes she’ll follow them for a few blocks, trying to place the feeling she gets when she looks at them. In the end, she always shakes her head and returns home, figuring it must be some weird quirk of hers from a childhood memory. She never finds out Henry does the same thing.

 

At night, her dreams are fuzzy and disjointed, voices speaking in hushed tones quieter than she can hear. The only thing she can ever discern is a voice calling for she and Henry. It’s so familiar but can only Emma toss and turn in bed trying to place it.

 

She never can.


	2. Now

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the lost year
> 
>   
> **Art by** [swanqueen-fangirl](http://swanqueen-fangirl.tumblr.com).  
>   
>   
> 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In section 20, the word d*ke is used, so skip over if you would prefer not to read it

**13**

 

The first time Regina sees Emma again, she can’t stop crying. Mostly it’s because with Emma comes Henry and no one except Snow (ironically) can even remotely understand how Regina has dealt with the last year.

 

When she sees Henry’s face come out of that yellow deathtrap she holds her hands up to her mouth to stifle the combination of a shriek and a sob. Without any preamble, she runs over and pulls him close, startled at how much taller he’s gotten. He melts into her chest, wrapping his arms around her waist.

 

“I missed you, Mom.”

 

She brings a hand up and strokes the mop of brown hair on his head. He smells just the same, like a year hasn’t passed, like he hasn’t been living in an apartment in New York oblivious to his true identity. She looks him over to make sure all of his limbs are intact, ten fingers, ten toes, no obvious injuries. He looks healthy and happy, and she sighs.

 

“Oh, Henry. I missed you, too.” She rests her head on his and closes her eyes to allow the feeling of relief wash over her. If she never opens her eyes again, this is the moment she would want to last forever.

 

“Hey.”

 

Regina lifts her head to look at Emma Swan, standing in her infamous red leather jacket. Her blonde hair has lost its curls and new wrinkles have appeared around her eyes. Regina is still crying, but she doesn’t care because she has her son back and Emma is alive and well.

 

“Emma!” Snow’s scream startles everyone and she pummels into Emma. Charming follows suit, but with less screaming and pummeling. His eyes are glossy as he takes his daughter into a gentle hug.

 

Emma smiles a tired smile and lets her parents smother her before pulling away and reassuring them she is functioning and has her memories back. Snow keeps reaching out to touch her daughter, like she might disappear again if given the chance.

 

“We’re so happy you’re back,” Snow whispers.

 

“It’s good to be back,” Emma returns. “New York was exciting, but nothing compared to Storybrooke’s level of exciting.”

 

Snow and Charming laugh for the first time in a long time and Regina’s lips turns up from her spot a few feet away. Henry looks up.

 

“Can I go hug Gram and Gramps?” Oh, his voice has finally deepened and it keeps hitting her how much older he is. She laments her lost year with him for only a moment, allowing the loss to sadden her once again. But, as she knows she must, she nods and scoots her son off to his grandparents.

 

“I said ‘hey,’” comes Emma voice again.

 

Regina turns to see Emma walking toward her, still shuffling along like a high school football player. She crosses her arms defensively, emotions she hasn’t felt in a long time bubbling up again. Emma Swan, the Savior, the spitfire, the infuriating sheriff who gave her all the trouble in the world. Emma Swan, who she couldn’t stop thinking about in between her fits of depression over Henry’s loss. The woman who saved her over and over again when everyone else would have left her to die. The woman to whom she gave all of her own memories of raising Henry. She trusted his life with Emma Swan because what else could she do?

 

Regina shrugs her shoulders.

 

“Hey.”

 

Before she registers what’s happening, Emma comes over to her and brushes the hair out of her face. She flinches on instinct.

 

“What are you-?”

 

“I missed you, too.” Emma cuts in.

 

She cups the side of Regina’s cheek. Regina feels her heartbeat stutter in her chest, her mind reeling at the contact. Surely Emma wasn’t-

 

“Can I kiss you?”

 

“ _What?_ But your parents! Henry!” is the only thing that Regina hisses, her brain ceasing to form complete thoughts. All she can feel is the warmth of Emma’s hand on her cheek and the stares of the other people around them.

 

“I don’t care. Can I kiss you?”

 

Regina gazes into Emma’s eyes, looking for some sort of joke, some sign that she was being mocked or set up. All that is returned to her is sincerity and perhaps even a little bit of hesitancy.

 

“Emma Swan, you fool.” 

 

The first time Regina kisses Emma she feels like the world has stopped. It sounds so terribly cheesy, but damned if Regina cares. Her whole body becomes electrified and her limbs are tingling with a strange feeling she hasn’t felt in many years. One hand comes up to cup the back of Emma’s head and the other rests on her waist.

 

Emma lips are chapped and dry, but they attack Regina’s like they’ve been waiting to do this for a long time. Regina’s eyes snap open.

 

Has Emma been waiting to do this for a long time?

 

She finally pulls back, her lips buzzing almost as much as her head. Emma’s cheeks are flushed and her hair is sticking out at odd angles where Regina’s hands made quick work of tangling it.

 

“That was quite a greeting, Miss Swan.”

 

“Please, if I don’t deserve ‘Emma’ at this point, I don’t know when I will.”

 

Regina looks over to see Snow standing with her mouth hung open and Charming looking away. Henry is smiling like he knew all along—of course he did, the clever child. Everyone else is staring at the ground or whispering among themselves.

 

“Alright, _Emma_. That was quite some greeting.”

 

Emma leans in again, but instead of kissing her, she just rests her forehead against Regina’s. Emma’s breath brushes against her nose and Regina lets out a shaky sigh.

 

“I was always waiting, you know. Even after all these years, I’m still silly and hold out hope when I shouldn’t.”

 

“Here’s the thing,” Emma starts, and takes Regina’s hands into her own. “You were right.”

 

Explaining things to the Charmings will be a disaster. Even now she knows Snow is roiling with emotions from her daughter and grandson’s return, and this is just the cherry on top of her traumatic year. Henry will ask questions until he interrogates them to death, and Emma will be useless through the entire thing.

 

But she can’t really bring herself to care when Emma is brushing her thumbs over Regina’s palms and smiling sheepishly at her.

 

_Oh, Emma, you fool._

 

**14**

 

The first date she takes Regina on costs Emma $44.79. She buys two containers of takeout from Granny’s (chicken salad and breadsticks for Regina, hamburger and fries for her), a set of four wine glasses, and the cheapest bottle of white wine she can find that looks decent enough that Regina won’t scoff at it. She wraps two of the glasses in cloth napkins and puts them on top of the food containers and picnic blanket. She closes the basket and makes sure to click both clasps shut so the contents don’t litter her trunk given her tendency for sharp turns.

 

It’s 5:02 when she rings Regina’s doorbell. Emma has a bouquet of daisies in one hand while the other is nervously scrunching up the fabric of her shirt. She chose jeans and a button-down, hoping that is was dressy enough to keep Regina from making a snarky comment but not dressy enough to be ruined at the beach.

 

The big white door opens and Regina appears. Emma can’t help but smile when she sees the other woman, dressed as casually as she’s ever seen in black slacks and a white t-shirt instead of a mayoral suit.

 

“Hey,” Emma offers.

 

“Is that always going to be the way you greet me?”

 

Emma rolls her eyes and holds out the flowers.

 

“Good evening, Your Majesty.”

 

Regina smirks and plucks the bouquet from Emma’s hands, retreating into her house and beckoning for Emma to follow. She does, and realizes it’s the first time she’s been inside the house since the curse broke.

 

“Let me just put these into a vase before we leave,” Regina says as she walks into the kitchen and pulls a beautiful green container from the cupboard. Emma watches her clip the stems on the bottom of the flowers and arrange them so they sit symmetrically.

 

“Thank you. The flowers are lovely.”

 

Emma drops her head, feeling her cheeks burn.

 

“It wasn’t a problem. Just thought you could use something to brighten up the house.”

 

Regina’s eyebrows rise. “Oh, really?”

 

“No! Sorry, I meant- not like your house needs any brightening-“

 

“Shut up, Emma.”

 

Regina crosses the distance between them and places a tender kiss on Emma’s lips, effectively rendering her silent.

 

“It’s okay.”

 

Emma’s cheeks are definitely red now and she feels like a total idiot. This is the first time she’s actually taken someone on a date and she’s already acting like an awkward teenager.

 

“Okay. I’m glad it’s okay.” She smiles at Regina in a way she hopes conveys apology. For being awkward?

 

“Have you planned something, or are we just going to eat here in the kitchen?”

 

“Your chariot awaits.” Emma motions to the front door and they both make their way down the path to where her car is parked on the street.

 

“You promise this will hold up while you’re driving?” Regina says as she taps the hood of the car. There are dings and scratches all over the front.

 

Emma pulls open the passenger door and Regina steps inside with all the grace of a queen. In truth, Emma had spent the morning cleaning out her car, stripping all the rugs and shaking them out, vacuuming every surface, and washing the outside with the help of Henry. (She paid him five dollars for his troubles, which is probably the only reason he’d agreed.) She can’t help that her baby has permanent bruises from the adventures she’s had.

 

“I would bet my life on this car holding up. If you only knew what it’s been through.”

 

“I’m sure I can take a guess.”

 

Emma starts the engine and begins the drive to the beach. Regina doesn’t know where they’re going; all Emma had said was to dress casually and come hungry. To Emma’s delight, the weather is holding spectacularly. May had finally turned from late rains into sunny days with giant white clouds floating lazily across the sky. She couldn’t have asked for better weather and hopes her plans won’t be thwarted by evening rain. (She’d been checking the weather channel all week to make sure she picked a good day.)

 

“So where are we heading, oh chivalrous one?” Regina asks. She’s resting her chin on her hand and staring out the window.

 

“Can’t tell. Won’t be a surprise if I do.”

 

Regina scoffs but doesn’t say another word.

 

Emma isn’t really sure this is an appropriate first date. She’s not sure what would be considered an appropriate first date for an ex-evil queen-slash-mayor-slash-mother of her child. To be honest, she’s not sure Regina has ever been on a date before. Maybe this is her _first_ first date.

 

Emma’s hands become clammy as she grips the steering wheel a little harder.

 

After her first day back in Storybrooke and that impromptu kiss in front of the whole damned town, Emma can only seem to think about Regina. It’s not like she’s been ignoring everyone else. On the contrary, she had a lot of explaining to do to her parents, and Henry had indeed interrogated her to death. She’d caught up with the rest of the town members and survived Ruby giving her the most crap in the world for the stunt she’d pulled.

 

_“I can’t believe you kissed Regina in front of your parents!”_

_“I can’t really believe it, either.”_

_“Shit, girl,” Ruby says, slapping Emma on back the while they have their coffee date on the diner’s off-day._

_“Well, you’d better court her now that you’ve kissed her. You don’t just kiss a queen and then go from there.”_

_Emma’s heart speeds up. “Court her? What the hell, Ruby? What is this, Medieval Times?”_

_“Sort of? I mean, you don’t have to do anything spectacular, but it’d be nice. Regina didn’t have the best year.”_

_Emma sighs and drops her head onto the counter, her drink forgotten next to her._

_“I know. I’m just not used to this. I don’t even know why I kissed her. Okay, I know why I did. But I’m still just this big jumble of-“_

_She sits up and waves her hands in the air. “I don’t know!”_

_Ruby puts a hand on her shoulder and smiles. “It’s okay to be ‘I don’t know.’ Just give it some time.”_

 

One week later, Emma had called Regina tentatively on the phone and asked if she could pick her up for dinner on Friday night.

 

Now here they are. Emma takes a final turn that can lead nowhere but the beach, and she sees Regina’s lips curl up beside her.

 

“Dinner at the beach?”

 

Emma pulls the car into the lot and parks it by the edge of the sand.

 

“Don’t knock it ‘til you try it,” she says before hopping out and going around to the back. She pops the trunk and sees Regina step out of the car to watch her with arms crossed. Emma shuts the trunk and holds up the picnic basket. Regina only watches with a skeptical look, following her to the edge of the parking lot where the sand starts.

 

They make their way down the beach and when Emma finds a spot she deems suitable, she opens the basket and pulls out the red and white-checkered blanket. Cliché, she knows, but it’s hard to go wrong with a picnic.

 

She pulls off her boots and watches Regina tentatively do the same with her flats. When they’ve both made themselves comfortable, Emma begins to take out the food.

 

“How did you know chicken salad was my favorite?” Regina asks, accepting the takeout container and opening it to reveal the grilled chicken atop a bed of greens.

 

“I inquired with a certain werewolf.”

 

“Point one for you.”

 

Emma smiles and unwraps her hamburger. Regina’s face screws up.

 

“I take it back. You lose that point because of the hamburger.”

 

“Are you kidding me?”

 

“Very much so.”

 

The sun begins to set as they work through their way through the food. The clouds above the bay catch the light and glow a faint pink, the bay water shimmering as the tide lazily comes in.

 

Emma lets out an “oh!” halfway through her fries and Regina nearly drops her salad.

 

“I forgot about the wine!”

 

She scurries backward to the basket and pulls out the bottle, quickly uncorking it and filling one glass for Regina and one glass for herself.

 

“I’m impressed. Real glasses, too.”

 

Emma feels the blush crawl back onto her cheeks and holds the wine glass up.

 

“Here’s to not messing this up too badly.”

 

Regina stares at her for a second before letting out a peal of laughter. Their glasses clink together and Emma doesn’t spill any wine on herself all night.

 

**15**

 

"If you could be any animal in the world, what animal would you be?"

 

"What kind of first date question is that?"

 

The foam from the waves simmers along the sand at the edge of the water. The tide has come up all the way and they’d had to quickly move the blanket to avoid getting wet.

 

"So this is a date?”

 

"I thought you were never going to be able to open that wine bottle, but life keeps surprising me."

 

"So what kind of animal would you be?" Emma is persistent. She tips the bottle enough to send more of the pale liquid out into her cup before refilling the other woman’s.

 

"What do you think?" Regina asks pointedly.

 

"This isn't a guessing game, this is getting-to-know-you game."

 

"If this is your idea of a first date question, I'm not sure a second date is in your future."

 

"I'd be a lion."

 

Regina shifts on the blanket and brings her cup to her lips, letting the wine sit in her mouth before swallowing. The ocean breeze is cool in the evening, and a burgundy blanket covers their legs.

 

"Why a lion?"

 

Emma shrugs. "Lions are pretty badass. No one would bother me. And no one would mess with the people I love if I were a lion."

 

"Hmm. Very Savior-like of you."

 

Emma nudges Regina. "Can’t help it. Your turn."

 

"This game is juvenile."

 

"You're the one being juvenile. If you'd just answer, I'd stop pestering you."

 

Regina decides to ignore that last statement. She could point out that it is indeed more childish that Emma keeps pestering her, but that would only lead to more pestering. She takes another sip of her drink. The wine is better than she thought it would be. She'd feared the worst when she had seen Emma pull the bottle out from the picnic basket and flourish it with a grin before revealing two _not plastic_ glasses she'd hidden behind her back.

 

"I think I'd be a bird." Regina's eyes close and she lets the ocean wind ruffle her hair. It will be tangled in the morning, but the smell of the salt and seaweed fills her nostrils and she shakes out the stiffness she'd be holding in her shoulders.

 

"A bird? I pinned you more for a poisonous snake or a scorpion."

 

She fixes Emma with a glare. " _Really_? A scorpion? Why would I want to be something that could be so easily stepped on?"

 

"Snakes aren’t easy to step on. They move too fast. And if you step on a scorpion, you might poison the person who stepped on you."

 

"Yes, but you’d be dead. Birds can go wherever they want. It's hard to crush a bird." Regina picks at the remnants of salad on the paper plate next to her. Emma had put in all of her favorite ingredients, no doubt with some help from Ruby. "Birds are free to come and go as they please. Wouldn't you want to be able to fly?"

 

Emma shrugs again. "I guess. I could never do heights, though. Terrifies me."

 

"But you'd never fall if you were a bird. That's the beauty of it."

 

The stars begin to peek through the wisps of clouds. Storybrooke is far enough north and away from Portland that the night skies are clear and crisp. On the best of nights, it’s possible to see the roundness of the earth in the stars. Regina mentally pats herself on the back for picking such a beautiful location to curse an entire realm.

 

She hasn’t said anything yet, but this, all of this together, has been one of the best days she can remember. Truthfully, she’s terrified of what’s happening between she and Emma. She’s abnormally shy and tentative and worried that one wrong word will send Emma running. What happens when Emma realizes whom she decided to kiss?

 

“You think too much.”

 

Regina puts her wine glass down and lays back on the picnic blanket. Emma follows and pulls the blanket up over them to keep in the warmth, scooting closer to Regina as she does so.

 

“Someone has to think double to make up for you.” Emma swats her arm. Regina chuckles and pulls the blanket up to her chin.

 

They sit in silence for a little while and Regina keeps wondering if she’s supposed to do something. Should she thank Emma now? What about after this is over? When will it be over? Not that she wants it to be over…

 

“Emma-“

 

“Regina-“

 

They both stop talking, waiting for the other to continue. Regina feels her chest flutter with anticipation, and she’s not sure why until she realizes all she’s wanted to do since they’ve finished eating is _touch_ Emma.

 

It’s the first time Regina really _touches_ Emma.

 

It starts when Regina shifts so all she can see is that halo of blonde curls and the dim reflection of herself in eyes still visible in the fading light. She reaches a hand out and brushes some of the curls away so Emma’s face is clear in front of her.

 

“Thank you,” she whispers, before closing the distance between them and capturing Emma’s lips.

 

Emma brings a hand to rest behind Regina’s head and pull her in closer. Emma’s lips are still chapped, but Regina just smiles into the kiss and wraps her legs around the other woman.

 

When they finally pull apart, Regina feels hot, her skin burning and aching for more. A fire has sparked inside of her and she’s afraid she’s becoming lost to it.

 

“For what?” Emma gasps, her breath taken from her by Regina’s insistent mouth.

 

“For this, for everything. For defending me, for taking care of Henry, for coming back.” Regina reaches out again and begins to unbutton Emma’s shirt. Emma catches on and does her best to shrug out if it, getting tangled in one of the sleeves before finally ridding herself of it.

 

Regina leans in and kisses behind Emma’s ear.

 

“For believing in me.”

 

She kisses down Emma’s neck, feather light lips gracing over skin until it shivers beneath her. She brings one hand to splay across Emma’s back, nails just digging into the flesh. She delights in Emma’s little moans every time she pushes a little too hard.

 

“May I?” Regina asks as her fingers hover over the waistline of Emma’s jeans.

 

“What about you?” Emma questions, cupping Regina’s face and kissing along her jawline.

 

It takes Regina a moment to realize Emma’s fingers are tracing the hem of her shirt. It takes her even longer to realize that Emma might actually want to touch her, too.

 

“Are you okay?” Emma asks, seeing Regina has frozen in her movements.

 

“You’re sure?” Regina says, her voice just above a whisper.

 

“About taking your shirt off?” Emma laughs. “Yeah, I’m pretty sure.” She wraps her arms around Regina. “Very sure.”

 

When Regina is finally without her shirt, she feels vulnerable. She’s not used to being shown the affection Emma is set on giving her, kisses peppering her neck and collarbones. She cautiously brings a hand up to bury in Emma’s hair. She closes her eyes and lets sensation overtake her.

 

Emma is all over her, tracing skin, pulling, pushing. Soon, Regina relaxes into the touch and lets the fire consume her again. It simmers under her skin, begging to be quelled. She lets out a small mewling noise as Emma’s fingers dip to her waist and tug on her pants. This time, she readily reaches down to assist in their removal, tugging them down as fast as she can and kicking them off into the sand. Emma paws at her own pants, breaking their kiss for a moment so she can back up and peel them off.

 

Before Emma can even fully get her jeans off her ankles, Regina is back on her, kissing her with everything she can give. She reaches down and puts a hand on Emma’s stomach, fingers tracing the skin and moving downward in lazy swirls.

 

“It’s okay to keep going,” Emma murmurs between kisses.

 

Butterflies fill Regina’s stomach. She wants to curse at how nervous she is, berate herself for being so unsure. But all she can do is let herself fall to the passion that is Emma Swan.

 

The first time she really _touches_ Emma, all she can do is shut her eyes and let out a small _oh_. Emma is soft and hot and silky and Regina doesn’t know if she’s ever felt anything so wonderful. Emma drops her head to Regina’s shoulders and lets out a long breath.

 

Regina feels Emma’s hands come around and undo her bra. The other woman’s fingers are trembling as they unclasp the hooks and suddenly Regina is naked save for her underwear. She feels a hot blush creep onto her cheeks, partially from the exposure, partially from the way Emma’s mouth has started its descent to her breasts. She hums when wet lips wrap around one nipple and a hand palms the other. Her fingers stutter and Emma bucks from the friction.

 

A spark of magic bubbles up inside of Regina. It pools in her core and simmers in her skin like electricity. She can’t tamp it down as it trickles into her veins. Her body is alight and moving on its own, bending and twisting from the combination of Emma’s mouth working relentlessly and Emma’s heat around her hand.

 

Emma pulls her head back and whimpers. Her hands find purchase around Regina’s waist and she digs into the skin.

 

Regina’s magic explodes at the touch.

 

Her body curls into Emma’s as the other woman gasps and shudders around her fingers. Regina’s eyes are still squeezed shut, her body thrumming with the residue of magic. A bead of sweat rolls down her back and she bows her head. The world is still and all she can feel is the heat radiating between she and Emma.

 

When Emma finally comes back to reality, she puts a hand under Regina’s chin and kisses around the edge of her lips, finally resting their foreheads together as she did on the day of she and Henry’s return.

 

“That was amazing,” she starts, still breathing heavily, “but isn’t magic cheating a little bit?”

 

Regina buries her face in Emma’s curls, smiling to herself. “ _That_ was unplanned.”

 

Emma strokes Regina’s hair in silence for a few minutes and Regina moves into the touch. The waves are small tonight, barely making any noise as they lap up on the shore. She looks up into the stars and wonders how on earth she got so lucky and desperately hopes it won’t be taken away.

 

She nearly jumps as she feels Emma’s hands wandering down her torso.

 

“What, I can’t return the favor?”

 

Regina stares for a moment before nodding her head and wrapping her arms around Emma’s waist. Emma smiles and pulls them together so the only space between them is the gap between their lips.

 

The first time Emma _really_ touches Regina is the first time in a long while Regina feels truly cared for.

 

**16**

 

The first fight they get into is over Henry joining Storybrooke’s little league football team. (Well, it’s not the _first_ fight considering their history. But it’s their first fight post-reunion.)

 

The registration deadline is tomorrow and Henry had asked Emma to sign the permission form.

 

Regina finds out about this when she comes home from work and discovers the form discarded by Emma and forgotten by Henry on the dining room table.

 

Emma knows she’s in deep shit when she hears, “Miss Swan, Henry, get down here _right now_ ,” in Regina’s ‘serious business’ voice. She winces and rolls out of bed where she’d been reading some crime novel from Regina’s vast collection of books.

 

She meets Henry in the hall, his face wracked with the guilt hers must mirror.

 

“She only uses ‘Miss Swan’ when she’s really mad at you,” he says as the make their way down the stairs.

 

Emma sighs. “I know. Any idea what we did?”

 

Henry shrugs. “Nope.”

 

Regina is waiting in the dining room, arms crossed and the permission form hanging from one hand. The moment Emma sees the yellow paper, she groans.

 

“Regina, wait-“

 

“ _Did you think this was a good idea?”_

 

“Henry just wanted to get involved in something, I thought this _was_ a good idea.”

 

Henry steps in. “Yeah, Mom, it’s alright. I really wanted to.”

 

“Henry,” Regina spits, her voice leaving no room for discussion. “I changed my mind. Go back to your room. I’ll call you when dinner is ready.”

 

Henry slinks back to the stairs and gives Emma a _good luck_ look before shuffling back to his room.

 

“Now, explain.”

 

Emma holds her hands out in front of her. “Look, this is not as big of a deal as you’re making it. Henry wanted to join the football team, and he needed me to sign the form, end of story.”

 

Regina shakes the paper like she’s trying to kill it. “Football is a terrible idea!” she all but shrieks. “Do you know how much you can injure yourself playing football?”

 

Emma rolls her eyes, which is a bad choice that only sets Regina off more.

 

“The amount of concussions people get from being tackled to the ground is unbelievable. Not to mention the frequent minor injuries that come from running into people twice your weight.”

 

“It’s gonna be a bunch of middle-schoolers. No one is that big in middle school.”

 

“Tackled to the ground, Miss Swan-“

 

“Stop calling me that!” Emma shouts for the first time. She’s so annoyed at Regina right now and she can’t even reason with her to get around it. The icing on the cake is _Miss Swan_ being thrown around like it’s her first day in Storybrooke and she’s back to being the enemy.

 

“My name is _Emma_ and we’ve been living together for four months so I think you can find it within yourself to do me that favor.”

 

“Don’t you dare change the subject.”

 

“I’m not the one freaking out that my son is joining extracurricular activities! Jesus, I thought you’d be happy he’s decided to do something outside of school.”

 

“I was hoping for something a little less violent. But it seems like he takes after you.”

 

Emma bristles, the animosity toward Regina she’d gotten over long ago rising to the surface again.

 

“Well, he can’t join half the other teams because some parents still haven’t gotten over the fact that you cursed them.” It’s a cruel thing to say, but Emma _has_ always been impulsive.

 

Regina’s eyes widen in a way that would be comical if the situation weren’t so serious. Her lip twitches and her nostrils flare, and before Emma can react, Regina rips the permission slip in half.

 

“Wait, I’m sorry,” Emma tries, taking a step toward the other woman.

 

“Don’t speak to me,” Regina counters, turning her back on Emma and walking to the kitchen. “Just—just come down when I finish making dinner.”

 

Emma knows she’s been dismissed. She wants to yell something back, but instead she turns on her heel and stomps up the stairs. She’s being childish, but she doesn’t care and makes sure to stomp extra loud on the last step. For good measure, she jumps up and down on the landing a few times.

 

Throwing the door to the guest room open, Emma launches herself onto the bed and pulls a pillow to her face before screaming into it. The sound is muffled and her face turns red from the extended exclamation.

 

They’ve both royally (no pun intended) fucked up.

 

Dinner is an awkward affair, no one talking save for Henry asking Emma to pass the salad bowl. It’s delicious, as always, but no one says so. Regina keeps her head down and finishes eating quickly before getting up and bringing her plate to the kitchen. When she’s gone, Henry leans over toward Emma.

 

“What did you do?” he whispers, an accusatory look on his face he could get from no one but Regina.

 

“Your mom and I are having a bit of a rough patch,” Emma answers, shoving a forkful of salad into her mouth so she doesn’t have to say anything else.

 

Henry deflates at Emma’s unwillingness to elaborate and proceeds to excuse himself from the table. Emma watches him leave and swallows the lettuce she’d almost been choking on.

 

-

 

Later, when Emma is still in self-exile in the guest room, she hears Henry finally shut his door to go to bed. When she’s sure he’s in for the night, she gets up and pads down the hall to where Regina will be sleeping alone. She presses an ear to the door and hears nothing.

 

Emma gently knocks on the door.

 

“Can I come in?” she asks, keeping her ear pressed to the cold wood.

 

There is a pause and suddenly the door opens just a crack, Regina’s tired eyes staring at her. When Emma just stands there, the door opens all the way and Regina walks back to her bed where she lays down.

 

“Is that a yes?”

 

“Get in here, idiot.”

 

Emma tries not to be hopeful that Regina is back to simply calling her ‘idiot’ instead of ‘Miss Swan.’ She slowly makes her way to the bed and stands by the edge, her knees brushing against the mattress.

 

“I’m sorry, Regina,” she starts. Her hands begin to sweat and she rubs them on her pajama pants. “I’m sorry I was really stupid earlier. I shouldn’t have said what I did.”

 

Regina sniffs from her position on the bed and rolls over to face Emma.

 

“No, you should not have.”

 

Emma takes a gamble sits on the edge of the bed, just shy of Regina’s body.

 

“You know, _you know_ not to use that against me. How it makes me feel,” Regina says, her voice so quiet Emma barely makes out the words.

 

“I know.”

 

“Then why did you?”

 

Emma breathes out heavily. “I was so annoyed, I wasn’t thinking. I’m impulsive and make poor choices. And I’m sorry. Really, I am.”

 

More silence.

 

“Okay.”

 

Emma picks at a lose thread coming off the edge of the sheets. “Why were you so pissed off Henry signed up for football?”

 

“I already told you-“

 

“No, it was more than that.” Emma is sure of it. Her superpower is shady at best, but she always knows when Regina is lying.

 

Emma lays down, facing away from Regina and bringing he knees up to her chest. She waits for a reply and closes her eyes when it doesn’t come.

 

“Why didn’t he ask me about it?”

 

She keeps her eyes closed. “Ask you about what?”

 

“Playing football. Was he scared I would say no?”

 

“No, of course not. He’s just forgetful and I was home when he remembered the permission slip.”

 

“Oh.” It’s a small _oh_ , like Regina realizes the reality of the situation. She’s never been good at admitting she’s wrong.

 

Emma feels a hand come up and hold her around the waist. She brings her own her down to interlock with Regina’s.

 

“You were upset because Henry asked me to sign his form?” It’s a good thing Regina can’t see her, because she’s rolling her eyes again.

 

“I’m still not used to sharing him with someone so much.”

 

Emma’s heart sinks a little at Regina’s mournful tone. She’s still a tiny bit angry at Regina for throwing such a fit, but she squeezes her fingers anyway.

 

“I was just- I know it’s silly, but…”

 

“Hm?”

 

“I’m just afraid, now that he has memories of you, more of them, that he’s pushing me away.”

 

“Oh, no, Regina.” Emma finally shifts on the bed so she’s facing the other woman.

 

“That’s not gonna happen. _You_ are the one that raised him for ten years. Any memories he has of me are just ones of you with my face on them instead of yours. I can’t even come close to providing what you have.”

 

Emma runs her hands through Regina’s hair.

 

“And anyway, why would he pick me when he can have two awesome moms instead of one?”

 

Regina still looks tired, but a small smile lifts the edges of her lips.

 

“I think you’re a keeper, Emma.”

 

Emma snorts. “I hope so, since I think you’re pretty okay, too.”

 

“Just pretty okay?”

 

“Will you stop calling me ‘Miss Swan?’”

 

“Can I call you ‘idiot’ instead?”

 

Emma pretends to think it over for a minute, pursing her lips and rubbing her chin.

 

“Hmm…. I guess that’s okay.”

 

“Idiot.”

 

**17**

 

It takes Regina almost a year of living with Emma in the house before she mentions Daniel. It’s not like she really wants to bring it up. There are some memories she wishes to keep buried under layers and layers of forced forgetfulness. Sometimes they rise to the surface and seem intent on hurting her all over again.

 

“You gonna tell me why you wear that ring?” Emma asks one day as they’re tag-teaming the dishes after dinner.

  
“What’s weird about wearing a ring?” Regina says, trying to keep a tone of indifference in her voice.

 

“You never take it off. You wear it every day. Just wondering if there’s any reason.”

 

“There’s no reason,” she says too fast, grabbing a plate from Emma’s hands and vigorously drying it.

 

She reaches out for another plate and when Emma just stands there, wrist deep in soapy water, Regina lets out a puff of air.

 

“It’s just a ring, dear. Why do you wear that circle necklace all the time, hm?”

 

“You’re lying.”

 

At Regina’s silence and indignant look, Emma turns back to the dishes.

 

“I know when you’re lying, Regina. You can’t hide it. And don’t change the subject.”

 

“It’s just a habit. The ring, I mean.”

 

Emma just bites her lip turns to the dishes again. Regina picks up the towel to keep drying. They don’t speak for the rest of the evening.

 

-

 

Regina realizes she’s been staring at the ceiling in her office when the phone buzzes next to her and she startles back to the present. She looks down to see Emma’s number illuminated on the screen. She contemplates turning the device off and ignoring the other woman, but Emma doesn’t take well to be ignored and will call again, and again, and again.

 

“Yes?”

 

“Can I bring you lunch?”

 

“Lunch?”

 

“I didn’t mean to push last night. So can I bring you lunch?”

 

Regina’s heart clenches in her chest.

 

“I suppose. I have a meeting at one, so be quick, please.” She hopes her voice doesn’t come off as too harsh, but meetings are meetings and the mayor can’t stop working because of a little pampering.

 

“Of course, Your Majesty. I’ll be there twenty minutes.”

 

Regina’s lips curl up at the name Emma so often resorts to. She ends the call without answering and leans forward on her desk. Out of habit, and without realizing it, she begins to twist the ring on her left hand before stopping and holding her hand in front of her.

 

It’s just a replacement ring of course, not Daniel’s. No, she gave up that in a fit of desperation all those months ago.

 

 _Years_ , a voice in the back of her head whispers. _Years,_ plural, since she traded her ring and last bit of Daniel for a poisoned apple to rid herself of Emma.

 

She rubs her temples and sits back in the chair heavily. It’s been years and there are still nights where all she can see before falling asleep is the husk of Daniel begging to be let go. Regina stills a feeling of immense sadness that threatens to overwhelm her, even now. She looks down at the ring, a mere attempt at the original that used to be in its place. The dull metal barely glimmers in the light anymore and she knows what she has to do.

 

Trying to momentarily put the ring (and Daniel) out of her mind, she shifts through the pile of papers on her desk to find something to keep her occupied before Emma arrives. The papers only keep her mind half-distracted and she readily pops out of her chair when there’s a knock on the door. Her chest is tight with an anxiety she’s not used to facing, the feeling only growing when Emma holds up two takeout bags from Granny’s. Emma notices the grimace immediately.

 

“Hey, are you okay?” The smile on Emma’s face is quickly replaced by concern.

 

“Yes, I am,” Regina says, and ushers Emma into the room before closing the door and locking it. She snatches one of the takeout bags and takes it back to her desk, where she sits and waits for the other woman to join her.

 

“Okay,” Emma starts, gingerly settling into the chair across the desk from Regina. “So you’re okay, but you’re looking at me like I killed your puppy.”

 

Regina wants to brush it off and just tell Emma she has a headache because wouldn’t that be so much easier? Instead she tries to take deep breaths in through her nose and still the frantic beating of her heart and the heat rising along her cheeks.

 

“The ring. It was Daniel’s.” She’d planned on putting forth some sort of build up, or background explanation. Maybe even a little bit of tragic backstory to set up for sympathy would have done the trick, but her treacherous mouth betrays her and she shuts her lips tightly after making the remark.

 

“Daniel...?” Emma tilts her head, the look of worry still very clear.

 

“Daniel, my ex-fiancé.” And now she’s put it in the open, and she waits, and she squeezes the edge of the desk with her hands until her knuckles turn white.

 

Emma is silent in front of her, and Regina can’t bring herself to look up in fear of seeing what disgust and confusion must be present on the other woman’s face. The silence continues and she suddenly feels foolish and regretful that she even brought it up in the first place. _Love is weakness_. The phrase running through her head tenses her up even more. All she wants to do is throw the ring across the room and tell Emma to get out, to leave her to wallow in something she hasn’t ever gotten over, not really.

 

“Hey, look at me.”

 

Hands gently cover her own and pry her fingers free from their death grip on the desk.

 

“Look at me, Regina.”

 

Regina lifts her head and loosens her grip. Emma’s lips are curled up slightly at the edges and her eyes hold none of the judgment Regina expected.

 

She takes in a deep breath and tries once again to quell the doubt circling in her stomach. And again, it’s of no use. Emma squeezes her hands but says nothing.

 

“His name was Daniel, and he used to-“ Regina finds her voice cracking on the last word and lets out a pathetic sob instead. She curses herself and how her body won’t just listen when she wants it to. This isn’t something she can't afford to go through again, but the tears won’t stop coming. She pulls a hand away to wipe them off.

 

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to,” Emma assures quickly, backing away a bit.

 

“No,” Regina says resolutely. “No.”

 

She reaches out for Emma’s hand again and holds it tightly.

 

“His name was Daniel, and he used to work at the stables where I lived as a girl.”

 

And so, for the first time, Regina tells someone the story of the stable boy in its entirety. As she struggles through putting together bits and pieces of memories that still cut like broken glass, the words become easier. She cancels her afternoon appointments, the food is long forgotten, and Emma doesn’t stop holding her hand the entire time, even when Regina lapses into long periods of silence.

 

When she’s done and her body is wrought with exhaustion, all she can do is fall into the hug Emma offers. She’s stiff in the embrace, still unused to such easy displays of affection. But the chorus of her mother’s voice has stilled in her mind and she feels like an immense weight has been lifted from her shoulders.

 

“I’m sorry,” Emma says quietly. They are the only words she’s said since Regina started recalling the story.

 

“So am I.”

 

That night, there are no images of Daniel that haunt Regina, no hollow words from the ghost of a man.

 

_Then love again._

 

**18**

 

Emma doesn’t talk about Neal much. The first time Regina asks about it, Emma shrugs it off, saying she’s happy he came back with them and didn't die.

 

Henry likes spending time with Neal, something that both Emma and Regina allow every so often. Emma feels like she cares more about it than Regina, and that surprises her.

 

“You don’t care that some guy who knocked me up when I was 17 wants to hang out with our son?”

 

Regina narrows her eyes from over the edge of the magazine she’s reading. They’re both lounging on chairs in the backyard in the last days of warm autumn weather. Emma has a copy of a report to catch up on and she’s slowly trudging through it.

 

“Not as much as you seem to care. I trust Neal has learned his lesson.”

 

Emma’s mouth hangs open. She raises her eyebrows and just goes back to her report.

 

“Look who’s feeling forgiving today.”

 

“It’s the weather,” Regina answers dryly, flipping the page of her magazine. “And besides, it makes Henry happy. Neal also knows he’ll be dead in a heartbeat if he tries anything.”

 

Emma can’t disagree. Regina had made it quite clear the first time Henry spent a weekend with Neal that if Henry wasn’t properly taken care of, Neal would lose a limb. Emma had given an apologetic look to him as she and Regina walked back to the car.

 

Sometimes Neal lingers at the door when he drops Henry off, and Emma gets the distinct feeling he’s hoping it’s always Emma who comes to greet Henry.

 

“Was what you said at in the Echo Caves true?”

 

Emma looks up at Regina and can immediately see the jealous streak a mile wide across the other woman’s face. So much for thinking Regina was taking this better than expected.

 

“How do you know about that?”

 

“Please, Emma. You think I don’t find out what happens. Your mother can’t keep her mouth shut about anything, especially regarding your love life. She has a tendency to slip in that area.”

 

Emma cheeks flush and she makes a note to let her mother know that a little privacy would be nice. She recalls her confession with a wave of embarrassment. Weepy Emma Swan, so upset and broken about losing Neal again that she couldn’t maintain any semblance of control over her emotions when she found out he was alive.

 

“I don’t love him anymore,” she says simply. “I think I love the memory, the idea of what Neal used to mean, and I’m still trying to figure that out.”

 

“How so?”

 

Emma lets out a breath and wishes Regina wouldn’t push so much. Neal isn’t someone she tries to focus her attention on, especially when it’s so obvious he still thinks he can be a part of her life in a way she doesn’t want him to be. And she’s still angry at him sometimes because, fate intervening or not, she still had a baby in jail, alone.

 

“Neal was what I needed when I was younger. He was exciting, funny, and most importantly, I felt like he was there for me.” Emma can see how Regina’s mouth purses into a thin line at talk of the past. _You asked_ , Emma thinks.

 

“And I feel like being away for a year and then coming back to everything… I just realized I can’t go back to that.”

 

She pauses for a moment to gauge Regina’s reaction. The other woman is still looking at the pages of the magazine, mouth still pursed, and eyebrows knit.

 

“But I also think there’s a part of me that will always love him, in some way. He’s changed so much and experienced a lot of things I’ll never understand, and that’s okay, too. Look. He’s here, and Henry likes him, and I don’t think he’ll be causing any trouble.”

 

“Even when he proposes to you?” Regina says.

 

“If he does, I’ll tell him he’s a little late to the show and this heart’s already been taken.”

 

Emma almost cringes at how cheesy it sounds, instantly blushing at her own words. However, Regina’s face seems to lift immediately. She won’t ever admit it, but Regina is the biggest softie in the world, and Emma isn’t above exploiting that every once in a while.

 

Maybe she and Neal can be friends again one day, as soon as he realizes that seventeen-year-old Emma and thirty one-year-old Emma are two vastly different people. It’s hard enough that some small part of her still can see him only as the first person to make her feel loved. She knows he’ll always be that to her, but she also knows that fourteen years is nearly half her life at this point and there are other paths to take.

 

“Shall I let Mr. Cassidy know of your poetic declaration?”

 

“Only if you want to deal with the broken-hearted son of Rumplestiltskin.”

 

“I’ll pass, dear. Careful, the wind is blowing away your paperwork.”

 

Emma swears and leaps out of her chair to grab at the pages that are floating away from the deck. Regina’s laughter follows her, but it’s not mocking. It’s affectionate, and although Neal was the first one to ever make her feel loved, there’s something about Regina’s laugh that makes Emma feel like she’ll never be unloved again.

 

“You missed one,” Regina calls after her. Emma flips her the bird and snatches the last of the papers back into her arms.

 

**19**

 

The first time Regina says _I love you_ to Emma, they’re sitting under the Fourth of July fireworks that the town always sets off over the bay. Henry has run off to share a blanket with Gretel, which had made both Emma and Regina’s eyes widen in surprise when he’d told them.

 

“Don’t try anything funny, kid!” Emma had yelled.

 

“Make sure you ask permission if you want to kiss her,” continued Regina’s voice.

 

Of course, Henry had looked mortified as he’d departed.

 

Their folding chairs touch at the armrests and Regina curls her hand into Emma’s.

 

“I can’t believe he’s hanging out with girls.”

 

Regina lets her head fall back against the headrest on her chair and sighs. “Don’t remind me.”

 

“What a charmer.”

 

“Do you mean _Charming?_ ”

 

Emma laughs and pulls a beer out from the cooler sitting next to them. She offers one to Regina, who asks for lemon water instead.

 

“Not even a little. That kid is a Mills through-and-through.”

 

“How so?”

 

“Have you seen the way he looks at me when I do something stupid? Total Mills glare.”

 

Regina tries to stifle the laugh that bubbles up but lets it out instead, bringing a hand up to cover her mouth. She quickly swallows the water in her mouth and coughs a few times to clear her throat.

 

“You’re right. He takes after me.”

 

Emma leans back and cracks open the beer. It sizzles and a thin layer of foam fills the top of the can before she slurps it off.

 

There’s a fizzle and suddenly the night sky is illuminated by a sea of red sparks. A collective gasp sounds from the crowd of people as the first firework erupts. Another boom follows, and soon there’s not a moment of darkness. Fireworks spill across the sky, creating billows of color. The lights reflect in the ocean water and create a mirror effect that takes Regina’s breath away. She’s always loved fireworks, even as a child. While something she could easily make with magic, there’s something special about the man-made explosions she can’t explain.

 

“These might be the best fireworks I’ve ever seen,” Emma says.

 

“I concur.”

 

Regina looks at Emma, whose hair is pulled back in a loose bun to keep it off her neck in the wretched humidity. She has a small smile permanently in place as she stares at the fireworks going off, only broken when an especially loud _boom_ makes her flinch.

 

Regina’s not sure why Emma looks so beautiful in that moment. Maybe it’s the fireworks making her own heart sentimental or the way Emma gets beer foam on her nose without even realizing it. Maybe it’s the summer heat making her head fuzzy because Regina always gets lightheaded in hot weather. Whatever it is, she can’t help bringing a hand up to wipe the foam off Emma’s nose.

 

“I love you, Emma Swan.”

 

Emma takes another sip of beer and smiles so widely Regina thinks she might hurt her cheeks.

 

“I love you, too.”

 

Regina takes the can out of Emma’s hand and places it into the cup-holder on the armrest before leaning over and pulling Emma by the collar of her shirt until their lips are pressed together.

 

They break apart as the firework finale starts, hundreds of explosions happening at once.

 

“As easy as you were to hate, I can’t think of an easier thing in the world than loving you.” Regina kisses Emma again and again until the fireworks are long over and the residual smoke has blown away over the ocean.

 

**20**

 

The first and last time someone calls Emma a dyke, Henry knocks two of the kid’s teeth out and gets suspended from school for a week.

 

Emma is proud of her son, and Regina puts up a bit of fight just for show before telling Henry in secret that kid is lucky she didn’t curse his ass into the next realm.

 

**21**

 

Henry decides he wants to save his parents boatloads of money and picks the University of Maine over Bates.

 

“Can’t you just magic money out of thin air?” Emma once asked.

 

Regina had given Emma _the look._

“First of all, that’s highly illegal. Secondly, I think I already did that when I first came over. Don’t worry, dear, we won’t be running out anytime soon. And besides, what makes Bates any better than the University of Maine? It’s all pomp and inflated status anyway.”

 

Regina has taught Henry well, so by the time mid-August comes around, he’s already packed. All of his school papers are in a folder he keeps in the new green canvas backpack Emma had bought him for his eighteenth birthday. The last thing he throws into his suitcase is his toothbrush the morning they’re set to leave.

 

She watches her son drag his bags down the stairs, his arms straining to lift the weight of too many pairs of shoes and an impressive comic book collection. Emma comes up behind her and rests her chin on Regina’s shoulder.

 

“Should we help him bring down the last of his bags?”

 

Henry almost trips over the bottom step and Regina instinctively lifts a hand in case he falls. She doesn’t use much magic anymore, but damned if she’ll let her son break his nose the day they’re driving him to college.

 

“How about you use those impressive arms of yours and get the last of them,” Regina suggests, and Emma slips out from behind her and saunters over to taunt Henry.

 

“Need some help from your mom?”

 

“I’m fine,” he grunts, dragging the suitcase over the carpet.

 

Emma scoffs and picks the heavy bag up easily. Henry has grown taller than both of them in the last two years, but he’s still gangly and all thin limbs.

 

“Show off,” Regina and Henry say at the same time.

 

Regina had insisted they take her Mercedes. The deathtrap is in no shape to drive the two hours north, and Henry did not want to show up to school in a police cruiser. Emma had argued it would give a badass first impression. He’d disagreed.

 

“The 80s Mercedes it is, then,” Emma says, popping the trunk and loading the boxes and bags into the car.

 

August has been unusually hot this year, so the air conditioning runs cold against Regina’s face as they approach the _Leaving Storybrooke_ sign.

 

_“Don’t forget to come back for breaks,” says Snow, pulling Henry into a tight hug._

_“And write us, at least once in a while,” adds Charming._

_“I’m down with an occasional e-mail,” Ruby says as she ruffles Henry’s hair. He bows away from her, laughing before coming back to hug her._

_“Bye, Henry!” Ruth pokes her head out from behind Snow’s legs. She has Snow’s dark hair but Charming’s piercing blue eyes. At six years old, she comes up just below Henry’s waist._

_Regina watches from the car as Henry says his goodbyes. Emma is assuring her parents they’ll be safe on the drive up and yes, she’ll call when they get there._

_After farewells that take too long for Regina’s liking, they finally all pile in the car among Henry’s things._

 

It’s still odd leaving Storybrooke. They’ve done it plenty of times in the past, but each time she passes the sign, Regina tenses up a little. This time, Emma’s steady hand is there to rest on her thigh.

 

“Can we put on some music?” Henry asks from the back seat, holding up his iPod.

 

“So long as it’s not something you know we both hate,” Emma says. Regina has vivid memories of Henry trying to convince them to listen to something horrible called dubstep.

 

“What do you want to listen to, Mom?”

 

“Do you still have that Alison Krauss album Emma bought you last year?”

 

Henry nods and plugs the cord into his iPod. Regina pushes the auxiliary button on the dashboard and the first notes fill the car.

 

Emma and Henry begin to play some game involving license plates as soon as they hit Route 1. Traffic in Camden is terrible, as always, and Regina curses herself for not trying to drive around it. Emma complains she has to use the bathroom right after they finally edge out of town and Regina almost smacks her.

 

“You can wait until we stop for lunch. Honestly, didn’t you go right before we left town?”

 

They reach Belfast soon enough and the moment Regina pulls into a parking spot near a diner, Emma springs from her seat and runs inside. Henry, the little sneak who hadn’t said anything the entire drive, bolts in after her.

 

Regina shuts the driver’s side door and sighs at the predictability.

 

Since it’s Henry’s last day as her little boy, she lets him have lobster for lunch. Emma gets the surf and turf, downing all of it to no one’s surprise. Regina opts for steamers and the salad bar. By the time they’re done eating, everyone is so full they can barely buckle their seat belts.

 

The rest of the drive is smooth until they’re outside of Orono where college traffic is already building up. Henry has remained quiet for the last part of the drive, plugging in his headphones and curling up in the back seat.

 

“Are you ready?” Emma asks when the signs directing them to the parent parking lot begin to appear.

 

Regina turns left and follows a slew of other cars onto campus. “No.”

 

“Me neither. Do you think you’ll ever be?”

 

“No,” Regina says again.

 

Henry is in a generic dorm and goes off to greet his roommate, a young man named Dennis from Rhode Island. In time, they lug Henry’s boxes into his new room, a small space with whitewashed brick walls and not nearly enough room to maneuver.

 

Regina becomes acutely aware of the stares they garner as they unpack. She does her best to return the looks with the most vivid Evil Queen glare she can manage. If anyone dares say anything, she will destroy them if it’s the last thing she does. She smiles to herself at the phrase. Always one for the dramatic, she feels she could still pull it off.

 

Emma makes small-talk with Dennis’s parents as Henry and Dennis himself finish arranging their room. Apparently Dennis is here only because he received a gracious scholarship for playing lacrosse.

 

The last thing Henry pulls out from his bag is the Once Upon a Time book, placing it on his desk so the cover faces outward. Regina sucks in a breath. She’d thought he’d lost it, or given it away at some garage sale years ago. It’s still strange knowing that in those pages are the last vestiges of everyone’s past.

 

“I think that’s everything,” he says, surveying the room from the doorway. He looks up at Regina and grins. “You guys ready to go to orientation?”

 

Regina and Emma both make it through the entire afternoon without shedding a tear, although Emma has to compose herself a few times during the assembly. Regina reaches over Henry’s lap and holds her hand, to which Henry mumbles something about ‘keeping it together.’

 

When it’s finally time to say goodbye, Regina’s not sure she really can keep it together at all.

 

“You’re sure you have everything you need?”

 

“I’m sure. And even if I’m missing something, you’re only two hours away and I can always pick stuff up in town.”

 

“Behave. We’ll miss you so much. Have fun, and don’t get into trouble.” Emma steps forward and wraps her arms around Henry. She makes a horrible whimpering noise and wipes the tears in her eyes away. Henry awkwardly puts a hand on her shoulder, offering her a tissue from his pocket.

 

“Bye, Ma.”

 

He turns to Regina.

 

It really does take everything she has to not break down and make her son come back home with them.

 

“Bye, Mom.” He closes the distance between them and holds her tightly against his chest. Regina closes her eyes and lifts her hands to return the hug. He smells just like he did when he was a child, just like he did when he returned to her after their year apart. Only now, he towers above her, pulling her into his shoulder. Henry finally breaks away and lifts up a hand to give a small wave before turning around a heading back toward his dorm. He’s all grown up.

 

“I’ll see you guys soon.” And then he’s gone, lost in a crowd of other students milling about and finding their footing in this new place.

 

The first time Regina drops her son at school, she cries the entire drive home.

 

Emma makes her pull over a couple miles out of Orono and demands to take over driving.

 

“You’re gonna kill us if you keep up like this.”

 

Regina hiccups and stumbles into the passenger seat. She opens the glove compartment and takes out a wad of tissues, which she mostly uses up before they even get back to Storybrooke.

 

It’s not until they hit traffic again in Camden that she notices Emma has been silently crying, the marks of tears trailing down her cheeks. Regina takes one of her tissues and dabs at Emma’s cheeks.

 

“We’ll be okay.”

 

By the time they pull onto Mifflin Street, Regina is out of tears and she feels like her eyes will be permanently puffy. Emma has let out the final sniffles of a new empty-nester and they both make their way inside.

 

Taking in a deep breath and steadying herself, Regina turns to Emma.

 

“How would you like a glass of the best apple cider you’ve ever tasted?”

 

Emma lets out a laugh and uses her hand to wipe her nose. “Got anything stronger?”

 

**22**

 

The first time Emma realizes she wants to spend the rest of her life with Regina is on New Year’s Eve. They’re huddled by the fireplace, the din of the other guests in the house kept to the dining room and kitchen.

 

Henry pops his head in, his hair long and shaggy and in desperate need of a cut.

 

“Is it alright if I have a glass of champagne? Gramps offered me one.”

 

“No,” Emma says immediately.

 

“Yes.”

 

Both parties turn to look at Regina.

 

“It’s not like there was a drinking age back in Fairytale Land. I was taking wine with dinner from the time I was ten.”

 

Henry looks back and forth between his parents, deciding if one mother’s approval trumps the other.

 

Emma huffs. “Fine, kid. But _one_ glass. If I have to scrape you off the floor tonight, you’ll never hear the end of it.”

 

“Thanks!” He closes the door behind him when he leaves.

 

“You ever get boozed up at dinner as a kid?”

 

Regina looks offended. “Of course not. We weren’t _peasants._ By a glass of wine, I meant a singular glass of wine.”

 

Emma leans into Regina, a glass of scotch in one hand and a party hat in the other. She’s pretty buzzed herself, the two bottles of spiced rum Leroy brought over quickly depleted by everyone over the course of the night.

 

“Hey, you wanna go outside and look at the moon? It’s supposed to be full tonight.”

 

“It’s ten below, Emma.”

 

“You have a coat. I have a coat. It’s too warm in here anyway.”

 

Regina groans and puts her own glass down, standing up in the heels she insisted on wearing. With them on, she stands two inches above Emma. They both walk to the door and make sure no one will notice their absence. Emma pulls on the down jacket Regina bought for her two Christmases ago. She’s glad she has it, because really, leather jackets aren’t cut out for Maine winters, no matter how many sweaters you put underneath them.

 

The air hits her like a freight train when she steps outside, her breath immediately billowing in front of her in rolling wisps. She hears a sharp, “When did it get this cold?” before the click of Regina’s heels signal she’s followed.

 

“It got this cold sometime when winter decided to come in full force. You sure you can’t do anything about that?”

 

Regina huddles up next to Emma and puts a hand out. Emma rests her hand on top and warmth fills her body. She smiles and hums at the feeling.

 

Regina hasn’t taught her much magic. In fact, Regina doesn’t use magic frequently. It only comes out for special occasions, like warming up chilled bodies or setting the star on top of their twelve-foot-tall Yule tree.

 

But when they touch, Emma finds it easy to do any spell Regina comes up with.

 

“Look, there’s the moon,” Regina murmurs, her eyes gazing upward.

 

A cloud shifts, blown by the wind, and the moon shines above them. It creates a halo of light that reflects across the sky, washing out the stars and casting a glow on the snow that blankets the ground. Emma loves looking at the moon, and tonight doesn’t disappoint her.

 

“Hey, Regina? Remember when we made a lunar eclipse?”

 

A nod.

 

“Should we try again?”

 

Regina breaks the warming spell and playfully swats Emma’s arm. “That would be highly inappropriate.”

 

“I’m kidding, I’m kidding!” Emma holds her hands up in mock defense. “That was pretty cool, though.”

 

“ _Pretty cool_ , indeed,” Regina echoes.

 

The racket inside increase and Emma looks down at her watch.

 

11:57.

 

“Nearly midnight.”

 

Regina rests her head on Emma’s shoulder.

 

“Hey, Regina?”

 

“Yes?”

 

Emma swallows, trying to draw on some of the liquid courage she’d ingested earlier, but to no avail. She’s sobered up way too much since stepping outside.

 

“Picking a cheesy time of year and all, I was wondering if-“ She bites her lip. Regina looks up expectantly.

 

“I was wondering if you wanted to do this for the rest of our lives.” As she says it, Emma feels a massive weight lift off her chest. She’d been waiting since Christmas to ask Regina, after chickening out multiple times before.

 

“I tried marriage once and it didn’t turn out so well.”

 

“No! I don’t mean like getting married. I just mean…” She shifts away from Regina and drops to her knee, taking Regina’s hands in hers. Puzzled eyes stare down into her own.

 

“Regina Mills, will you spend the rest of your life with me in happy unmarried bliss?” It sounds foolish, really, but it’s all Emma can come up with on the spot. Her knee is digging into a patch of ice and the cold is going right through her denim. She wants to stand up so badly but keeps a firm hold on Regina’s hands.

 

“Idiot.” Regina pulls her off the ground and wraps her arms around Emma’s waist. “It took you long enough to ask.”

 

Emma chuckles. “Must be the Charming in me.”

 

There’s a raucous noise that comes from inside and Emma peeks in the window to see the TV screen filled with confetti.

 

“Happy New Year.”

 

She kisses Regina under the moon. They’re cold from the bitter wind that keeps whipping up outside. Emma brings her hands up to cup the sides of Regina’s face, protecting the skin there and rubbing her fingers in small circles over the other woman’s cheeks.

 

“After all these years, I’ve still held out hope for my happy ending,” Regina whispers, echoing her sentiment from years ago. “Funny to think it would be with you.” She leans in and her breath ghosts over Emma’s lips.

 

“But I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

 

When Emma looks into Regina’s eyes, she finally feels like she’s found home. It’s not a four-walled house, it’s not a place to sleep, and it’s not somewhere to come back to. It’s not a castle with a king and queen for parents, nor a throne room or fancy pedestal for the Savior. In this moment, home just feels like being in Regina’s arms.

 

“You don’t have to wait anymore, Regina. If anyone deserves a happy ending, it’s you.”

 

Regina grins and squeezes Emma’s hand. Her eyes are glittering in the moonlight and Emma doesn’t know if she’s ever seen anyone more beautiful in her life. Her heart thumps against her chest as she dips in to kiss Regina again. When they part, Regina laughs.

 

“Oh, Emma, you fool.” She rests her head on Emma’s shoulder and Emma feels like she could take on the world.

 

“My wonderful, perfect fool.”


End file.
